Frostbite, Dimitri POV
by KadyAngel
Summary: The whole book of Frostbite, Dimitri's POV!
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, Frostbite, DPOV. I'll do the whole book if desired, it's the summer, a lot of free time. So anyway, Read and Review please and thanks!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
**

**I don't own Vampire Academy, but I wish I did.  
**

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She was late. Another minute or so, and I was gonna go look for her. I leaned against the Honda Pilot, sighing. She was always late, what did I expect? Another five minutes and I was going to look for her. About three minutes later, she was in front of me.

"I know, I know," she said to me, "Sorry I'm late."

She looked distracted, but then abruptly pulled out of her thought. Snow began to fall, just light flakes, but it fell.

"Who else is going?" She asked me.

I shrugged. "Just you and me."

"How far is it," She asked, looking excited.

"Five hours," I cursed myself silently. Five hours in a car with her, was enough to drive me to the edge. I didn't know how long I could control myself alone in a car with her.

"Oh." She sounded slightly disappointed.

She was going to take her qualifier. I just had to hope I'd trained her well enough. This wasn't something you could study for, exactly… I listened to the music on the radio.

"Don't they usually come to the academy?" Rose's voice filled the quiet car, "I mean, I'm all for the field trip, but why are we going to them?" she asked.

"Actually, you're just going to a _him, _not a _them_." I told her, "Since this is a special case and he's doing us the favor, we're the ones making the trip." I explained.

"Who is he?" she inquired nervously. I almost laughed.

"Arthur Schoenberg." I said simply.

She looked at me, shocked.

"What?" She squeaked at me.

I could imagine what was going on in her head. Arthur had quite a history. He used to be head of the Guardians Council, until he retired to protect the royal family, the Badicas. Even now, he was pretty dangerous. His exploits were part of her school curriculum.

"Wasn't…wasn't there anyone else available?" She asked in a very small voice.

I hid a smile. "You'll do fine. Besides if Art approves of you, that's a great recommendation to have on your record." I reassured her.

Rose bit her lip, deep in thought.

"You'll be fine. The good in your record outweighs the bad." I encouraged her.

She looked at me. A moment later, she breathed in heavily, and looked away.

"Thanks, Coach," She teased me, adjusting herself in the seat.

"I'm here to help," I replied.

"You know what would really help?" She asked, but wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Hmm?" I asked warily.

"If you turned off this crap music and put on something that came out after the Berlin Wall went down." She remarked.

I laughed.

"Your worst class is history, yet somehow, you know everything about Eastern Europe." I commented, still smiling.

"Hey, gotta have material for my jokes, Comrade," she said lightly.

I turned the radio's dial to a country station.

"Hey! This isn't what I had in mind!" She exclaimed.

I was on the verge of laughing again.

"Pick. It's one or the other." I told her.

She sighed. "Go back to the 1980s stuff."

I flipped the radio's dial again, and Rose crossed her arms. Suddenly, that five hour drive didn't seem as long as I'd thought.

Art and the family he protected lived in a small town along the I-90. It wasn't far from Billings.

Rose convinced me to stop at a twenty-four hour diner along the way, but other than that, I only stopped to fill up on gas. It was around noon when we finally arrived. The house was one level, gray stained wood siding, and bay windows. The windows were tinted, of course. It looked fancy and new, it was what you'd expect from a royal moroi family.

There was an inch or so of snow on the ground, and it was almost silent, except for the wind blowing. We walked to the house, following a river rock path that cut through the snow-covered front yard.

Rose's foot slid on the icy path, so I instantly reached out to steady her, and keep her from falling.

"You okay?" I released my hold on her, even though I wanted to hold her forever.

"Yeah," she said, glaring at the sidewalk, "Haven't these people ever heard of salt?" she joked.

I froze. She instantly followed my lead. I became tense and alert, and searched the area with my eyes. I studied the building for a moment more, looked at the ice covered sidewalk and glanced at the driveway. There were no marks but our footprints.

"Rose, go wait in the car," I told her, quietly.

"But wh—" she began to complain, but I cut her off.

"Go." I commanded her.

She backed up, through the snow covered lawn, probably not wanting to slip on the sidewalk again. I didn't move until she'd slipped back into the car and closed the door almost silently.

With a gentle movement, I pushed the door the rest of the way open, and stepped inside. Inside there was an ordinary living room. But there was a body. The body of a woman. Her eyes wide face pale. Her throat had been ripped out. The body of a man lay feet away, a child beside him, and across the room, yet another body. And another. Bodies and blood surrounded me. I went to check out the rest of the house, when I heard a muffled whimper from the living room.

Rose.

I put my gloved hand over her mouth, and she struggled for a moment, and then stood still.

"Why, don't you ever listen? You'd be dead if _they _were still here." I told scolded her.

I waited a moment, and then pulled my hand from her mouth, but I stayed close. She turned to me.

"It's daytime. Bad things don't happen in the day." She whispered desperately. She sounded like a little girl.

"Bad things can happen anytime. And this didn't happen during the day. This probably happened a couple of nights ago." I informed her. I watched Rose peek at the bodies, and regret it. She looked at the body of Art.

"Arthur Schoenberg." I said.

"He's dead," she stated. "How can he be dead? How could a strigoi kill Arthur Schoenberg?" She asked incredulously.

I didn't answer. I moved my hand to where she held the stake in hers, and closed mine around it. She flinched.

"Where did you get this?" I asked her, and she loosened her grip, letting me have it.

"Outside. In the ground." She said plainly.

I held it up and studied it for a moment. "It broke the ward." I stated, only saying it out loud for Rose's benefit. She might not know these things, but she should. She deserves to know the whole truth.

"Strigoi can't touch stakes," she told me brokenly. "And no moroi or dhampir would do it." Everything she believe was being changed right now.

"A human might."

She met my eyes. "Human's don't help strigoi—" she stopped. She sounded as vulnerable as a child.

I felt sympathy for her. She looked to me.

"This changes everything, doesn't it?" She asked me. She was so vulnerable. So fragile. Everything she knew was changing.

"Yeah, it does. I told her honestly. She deserved the truth.

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**Tell me what you think!!! Review _please!!! _**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Frostbite, DPOV, chapter two. Tell me what you think. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the first chapter. Hope you like it!!! Tips would be helpful!!! Thanks!!!  
**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**

**I don't own VA, but I wish I did!!!  
**

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I made a phone call, and a team showed up at Art's house. Rose waited around, and I examined the house further with the team. I looked at the bodies, identified points of entry, and came up with a few scenarios. Then I went to sit with Rose in the car. Neither of us said a single word while we waited for them to finish up. Rose looked so scared, so helpless. I wanted to hold her, to stroke her hair and tell her everything would be okay. But I didn't. I couldn't.

She put on a tough face, all of the sudden. A group of guardians showed up, and I opened the car door. I looked at Rose, god she looked so small, and so fragile. I wished I could just erase this past hour from her mind. But I couldn't. I couldn't do anything for her. She must be so scared.

"You should see how this is done." I told her, hiding how I felt. She should get used to seeing things like this, they happened all the time. She'd have to this again probably once she was a guardian. She'd better get used to it.

She followed me inside reluctantly. I knew she didn't want to go back inside. She wanted to go back to the academy, or at least stay in the car. But she didn't she followed me. I guess she knew that no more bad things would happen.

I knew all of the guardians inside. They were all very shocked to find Rose was there. Everyone kept asking me why a novice was here. No one exactly rejected her being here, but it was still awkward having a novice there.

Rose kept behind us as we went through the house once more. We never touched anything. We figured out that the strigoi had entered the house through more than just the front door and back patio, but also in other places.

No one but Rose displayed fear or disgust at the scene. We were used to it. When Rose was turned around, guardians shot pitiful looks at her, remembering their first times. I remembered mine as if it was yesterday. It was so vivid.

I'd been nineteen. I'd just graduated, and I was on a mission. I walked into the household, and I expected to find the novice that I'd been assigned to bring to the Royal Court. Instead, I found a household of dead people. Twelve. Four guardians. Seven moroi. One strigoi. A guardian took one of them down. The rest escaped. Throats ripped out, blood all over the carpet. I'd had nightmares for weeks on end. I'd been alone, and was scared.

I snapped back to reality.

Tamara now crouched beside Art, she was the only woman in our group, and I knew Rose noticed that. Rose watched Tamara with interest. She wanted to see what the women did in our world. She wanted to see if they were equal. She wanted to see her future role.

Sadness and a hundred different emotions went through Tamara's eyes as she studied Art's face. "Oh, Arthur." She sighed. "Never thought I'd see this day. He was my mentor." With another pitiful sigh, she rose.

Rose's face went blank for a second. I wondered what she was thinking about. She came back to reality a moment later.

Tamara quickly gathered herself and regained her composure, something I had never lost. Rose still hadn't regained hers, she'd lost it when she'd walked into the building the first time. She was just a novice, what could you expect? She looked shocked, and scared.

"How could they do that?" Rose asked naively. All six of us turned to her.

"How could they kill _him?_" I asked curiously, wanting to know what she meant, wanting to understand her.

Tamara gave a small shrug, still keeping her composure. "The same way they kill everyone else. He's mortal, just like the rest of us."

"Yeah, but he's… you know, Arthur Schoenberg." Rose stated. She was so confused.

"You tell us, Rose. You've seen the house. Tell us how they did it." I encouraged her. We watched her while she figured it out.

"There were four points of entry, which means at least four strigoi. There were seven moroi…" she began, "… and three guardians. Too many kills. Four strigoi couldn't have taken down that many. Six probably could if they went for the guardians first and caught them by surprise. The family would have been too panicked to fight back." She informed us.

"And how did they catch the guardians by surprise?" I prompted her.

She hesitated. "Because the wards were broken. In a household without wards, there'd probably be a guardian walking the yard at night. But they wouldn't have done that here."

She was right, dead on, and I felt a jolt of pride. I had taught her how to do that. She had figured it out on her own. I nodded in approval, but I still felt pride over what she had deduced.

We continued on our survey. When we reached the bathroom Rose looked away. I knew why. She had seen it already, but she didn't want to see it again. The body stank, not rotting, but it stank, and there was blood everywhere. If I was her, I wouldn't look either.

I looked at the writing on the mirror. _Poor, poor Badicas. So few left. One royal family gone. Others to follow._ It said.

Tamara snorted in disgust, and I felt completely horrible. _Others to follow…_ the words seemed to echo in my head. We turned away studying the rest of the bathroom, in its complete horrors.

For the rest of the inspection, Rose seemed to be lost in thought, and I was too preoccupied to worry about it right now. She was alive, and that was all that mattered.

We finally got in the car, and Rose slammed the door so hard I thought it'd fall off. I felt a little shock. I looked at her in surprise.

"What's wrong?" I asked, worried.

"Are you serious?" she was practically shouting. "How can you ask that? You were there. You saw that."

"I did," I agreed. "But I'm not taking it out on the car." I told her. She was so upset. I couldn't blame her. This changed everything. For everyone.

We fastened our seatbelts.

"I hate them. I hate them all! I wish _I'd _been there. I would have ripped _their_ throats out!" she shouted angrily.

I stayed calm, staring at her. I was astonished. How could she say these things?

"You really think that's true? You think you could have done better than Art Schoenberg after seeing what the strigoi did in there? After seeing what Natalie did to you?" I asked her. She couldn't have done anything. We were helpless. She was helpless.

She faltered and I saw it. She was remembering that night. I could tell. I remembered that night. Seeing Rose, getting hurt. Killing another strigoi. Saving Rose. I remembered it all so vividly. I had been so scared for her.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She calmed down, and her eyes opened.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. She had gained control of her exploding temper, for now. I wondered what had caused it to spiral out of control like that.

"It's okay." I told her, and reached over and put my hand on hers. A few moments later, I removed it, and started the car. "It's been a long day. For all of us."

We got back to the academy around midnight, and everyone had already known about the massacre that had happened. I ordered Rose to go back to her dorm and go to sleep, because she was exhausted. She hadn't slept in twenty-four hours, and there were circles under her eyes. She needed rest. She'd promised me she'd go to sleep, but I doubted it.

I went to consult with the other guardians about what had happened at Art's house. I was tired, but ready for anything. I reached a group of guardians, and they were discussing what to do in hushed tones, because students kept trying to listen in.

"Belikov!" Alberta shouted. I walked over towards her.

"What happened at the Badica house?" She asked me.

"Arthur Schoenberg, and the Badicas are dead. At least six strigoi. Humans helped them to break the wards."

"Numbers unheard of! Humans! This changes _everything_ we know!" Alberta spoke frantically. She was scared.

We were all scared, for the students, for the moroi, for the dhampir, for everything. The academy was in danger. Strigoi numbers were increasing, and humans were now helping them. They could break the wards.

We'd have to up protection.

What were we going to do?

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**Tell me what you think!!! Tips? Dislikes? TELL ME!!! Thanks!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, the third chapter DPOV. Yeah. You know the drill. Read and review please!!! Enjoy!!! Thanks!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**

**I don't own VA, but I wish I did!!!  
**

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We had decided to take the whole academy to a ski resort. I wondered if everyone knew yet, but news spread quickly through the academy, so everyone probably knew. I hoped that Rose had gotten a good night's sleep. As I walked to the gym where Rose and I had our morning practice, I passed novices and moroi talking about the ski trip, and the incident with Art.

I sat in the gym. It'd be twenty minutes before Rose would be here, and that was counting on her being five minutes late. I set my things down, and set up the dummies. The dummies had different expressions, and looks. They looked different than actual humans, or strigoi, but they were effective.

I waited for Rose to show up, and she finally did, her back turned. She was talking to that novice, Mason. He acted like she did sometimes. I felt a pang of jealously, but then chastised myself for then thought. She was my student.

She said goodbye to Mason, and turned to me. She looked stunning. In her sweatpants and coat, she looked ready for anything. When she saw the dummies, her face lit up. She smiled. I lived for those smiles sometimes. No, she's my student! I kept reminding myself.

I leaned against the wall and held the stake for her to see, and her eyes finally caught sight of it. I waited for her reaction.

"Sweet," she breathed. With one hand, I tossed the stake in the air, waiting for her smart-ass comment. It spun a few times, and I caught the hilt.

"Please tell me I get to learn how to do _that _today." She never took her eyes off of the silver stake. I hid a smile.

"You'll be lucky if I let you _hold _it today." I told her. I waited for her to bring up the fact that she had already held one, in the Badica house, but she didn't. Maybe she had matured. Or maybe she just knew that there was no point, that it would get her nowhere.

She tossed her backpack on the floor and threw off her coat. She had on a jacket, and she looked hot in it. No, don't think that way, she's your student!

Her hair was pulled back, so it wouldn't get in her eyes, something I had yelled at her for many times before.

"You want me to tell you how they work and why I should always be cautious around them." She announced to me. I stopped flipping the stake and looked at her out of astonishment. How did she know?

"Come on," she laughed, "You don't think I know how you work by now? We've been doing this for almost three months. You always make me talk safety and responsibility before I can do anything fun." She looked at me.

"I see. Well I guess you've got it all figured out. By all means, go on with the lesson. I'll just wait over here until you need me again." I laughed with her. I tucked the stake into the leather sheath hanging from my belt and leaned comfortably against the wall. I put my hands in my pockets and waited for her to begin. She hesitated, and waited for me to say something else. When I didn't, she began.

"Silver always has powerful effects on any magical creature—it can help or hurt them if you put enough power into it. These stakes are really hard-core because it takes four different moroi to make them, and they use each of the elements during the forging." She paused, frowning. She thought for a moment and began again. "Well, except spirit. So these things are supercharged and are about the non-decapitating weapon that can do damage to a strigoi—but to kill them, it has to be through the heart." She concluded proudly.

"Will they hurt _you_?" I prompted her.

She shook her head once. Her ponytail bounced around. "No. I mean, well, yeah, if you drive one through my heart it will, but it won't hurt me like it would a moroi. Scratch one of them with this, and it'll hit them pretty hard—but not as hard as it'd hit a strigoi. And they won't hurt humans either." She recited to me, and looked proud of herself. I was proud of her. She had learned so much in her time here. I took pride in her. She stopped and stared out the window behind me, and I watched her. We kept going, she'd give me the information I desired, and I'd ask her a question here or there, just to keep her going. Ten minutes from the end of our lesson, I took Rose over to one of the dummies. It was a man with blonde hair, and a goatee. I took the silver stake out of the sheath, but didn't hand it over quite yet.

"Where are you going to put this?" I asked her.

"In the heart. I already told you that like a hundred times. Can I have it now?" She told me irritably, her temper visibly rising.

I smiled at Rose. One of those rare smiles I gave her. "Where's the heart?"

She gave me a look that said are-you-serious? I shrugged, waiting for her to show me.

With dramatic emphasis, she pointed to the left side of the dummy's chest, and I shook my head. My amusement grew when she looked at me in disbelief.

"That's not where the heart is." I told her, hiding another smile. She made me want to smile so much when I was with her.

"Sure it is. People put their hands over their hearts when they say the Pledge of Allegiance or sing the national anthem." She wanted to be right. I wanted her to be right.

I stared at her, waiting for the correct answer. She turned to the dummy, and studied it for a moment. She finally tapped the center of the dummy's chest with her index finger.

"Is it here?"She asked naively.

I arched an eyebrow. "I don't know. Is it?" I answered her question with a question. Her annoyance level shot up as she glared at me.

"That's what I'm asking you!" She almost shouted now.

"You shouldn't have to ask me. Don't you all have to take physiology?" I was pretty sure they all did, pretty sure anyway.

"Yeah. Junior year. I was on 'vacation,' remember?" I had hit a sore point with her, and I felt bad. "Can I please touch it now?" she was almost begging. I resisted the urge to laugh.

I flipped the stake one more time, let it flash in the light, and then put it in the sheath again. "I want you to _tell_ me where the heart is next time we meet. Exactly where. And I want to know what's in the way of it too." I had high expectations, she always complained. But I expect high from the best, and she was one of the best.

She glared at me fiercely, it didn't faze me though. She grabbed her things, and headed off to her first class, her mood fowl. I smiled to myself. Only Rose would be so mad about something so minute.

I walked out of the gym with my mood a polar opposite of Rose's. I ran into Janine Hathaway. She was almost running down the hall.

"Hathaway, where's the fire?" I asked her jokingly. Mistake number one. Janine Hathaway doesn't joke. She frowned at me.

"I'm late to class." She stated and went back to her run.

Class? God, she was more like Rose than you'd think at first sight. They were both smart-asses, the same hard stare, the same eyes, same setting of the mouth, same attitude. They were both headstrong, and tough. Rose was just as talented as her mother, and someday she'd be on the same level. Guardians began to arrive for the trip, and I went to greet them.

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**Hoped you liked it!!! Tell me what you think!!! Thanks!!! I'll update as soon as possible!!! Review please!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay, hope you like it!!! Review please, tell me what you like or hate, let me know!!! Anyway, enjoy!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**

**I don't own VA, but I wish I did!!!**

**

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I walked around the campus, greeting guardians as they arrived. They all knew me, and I knew them. I watched as the guardians interacted with each other, and talked about what they had done since they had last met. Many had killed strigoi, and some hadn't. The strigoi seemed to be more and more active lately. I decided to go to the class Rose was in, which happened to be where her mother was. I slipped in silently, without getting noticed, and I slid to the back of the room.

Janine Hathaway was at the front of the class speaking about some of her strigoi kills. Rose looked like she was ready to kill someone.

"I had just staked a strigoi when two more attacked," she explained to the class of novices. They all looked amazed and completely riveted in Janine's story. "I didn't have time to pull the stake out when the others jumped me. Fortunately, there was an open fireplace nearby, and I pushed one of the strigoi into it. The last one chased me outside, into an old shed. There was an axe inside and I used that to cut off her head. I then took a can of gasoline, and returned to the house. The one I'd thrown into the fireplace hadn't completely burned, but once I doused him in gasoline, he went up pretty quickly." I watched the novice's mouths drop open. The room was completely, entirely silent for Janine. Rose was the only one who looked unimpressed with Janine's tale.

Novices raised their hands and asked questions. After the tenth question, Rose raised her hand, to my surprise. It took Janine a while to notice her daughter's hand, and when she saw, she looked mildly surprised.

"So, Guardian Hathaway, why didn't you guys just secure the place?" Rose asked her mother. Oh, boy, this would be interesting.

Janine frowned. "What do you mean?"

Rose shrugged and slouched back into her chair. She attempted to look casual, and to some she may have, but she wasn't. "I don't know. It seems to me like you guys messed up. Why didn't you scope out the place and make sure it was clear of strigoi in the first place? Seems like you could have saved yourself a lot of trouble."

Everyone turned towards Rose. Janine froze, temporarily at a loss for words. She quickly gathered herself and spoke again. "If we hadn't gone through all that 'trouble,' there'd be seven more strigoi walking the world, _and _those other captured moroi would be dead or turned by now." She told Rose sharply.

"Yeah, yeah, I get how you guys saved the day and all that, but I'm going back to the principles here. I mean, this is a theory class, right?" Rose glanced at Stan who was glaring at her. "So I just want to figure out what went wrong in the beginning."

There was a small tightness in the set of Janine's lips, but that was the only sign of what I presumed to be her immense frustration with Rose.

"It's not that simple. The venue had an extremely complex layout. We went through it initially and found nothing. It's believed the strigoi came in after the festivities had started—or that there might have been passages and hidden rooms we hadn't been aware of." She replied calmly and coolly.

The class ooh'ed and ahh'ed at Janine's statement of possible hidden rooms and passages. Rose, on the other hand, looked like she was going to hit someone when she got the chance. I knew that she was going to cause more problems from the way this was going.

"So what you're saying is that you guys either failed to detect them during your first sweep, or they broke through the 'security' you set up during the party. Seems like someone messed up either way." Rose stated.

The tightness in Janine's lips grew, and her voice grew cold. "We did the best we could with an unusual situation. I can see how someone at your level might not be able to grasp the intricacies of what I'm describing, but once you've actually learned enough to go beyond _theory, _you'll see how different it is when you're actually out there and lives are in your hands."

"No doubt," Rose agreed. "Who am I to question your methods? I mean, whatever gets you the _molnija_ marks, right?" Oh, Rose.

"Miss Hathaway." Stan's voice rumbled. "Please take your things and go wait outside for the remainder of class," he commanded her. Her face turned from 'mad' to 'furious'.

"Are you serious? Since when is there anything wrong with asking questions?" She shrieked at him, looking as if she was about to lunge after him.

"Your attitude is what's wrong." He pointed at the classroom door. "Go." He commanded her. The room went even quieter if possible. She gathered her things, and walked out of the classroom with her head held high. That's Rose. It wasn't the first time she'd been kicked out of this class in front of me and all other amounts of guardians. She'd been kicked out multiple times.

Five minutes before class let out, Janine slipped out of the classroom, to talk to Rose, I assumed. I heard Rose and Janine arguing in the hall. When the bell rang, the other guardians and I slithered out.

I waited for the day's classes to end, so that Rose and I would have our practice. I wondered if she figured out where the heart was yet. I hoped she knew, so that I could work with her stake skills. She needed to learn.

I hoped her mood wouldn't be too fowl. I loved seeing her happy. Finally, she arrived for her after school practice. She didn't look at me, but went straight up to the dummy, and slapped the center of the chest, slightly to the left.

"There. The heart is there, and the sternum and ribs are in the way. Can I have the stake now?" she asked. She was having a bad day, and I felt bad for her.

She crossed her arms, and glanced at me triumphantly. I nodded in acknowledgement.

"And how do you get through the sternum and the ribs?" I fired the question at her. She should have been expecting that.

She sighed. We spent a large part of the lesson with me teaching her techniques that would yield the quickest kill. When I finally thought she was ready, I extended my hand to her, offering her the stake.

"You're giving it to me?" she asked, holding back. The fact that she was holding back surprised me, and made me wonder what she was thinking. Rose was ready.

"I can't believe you're holding back. I figured you'd have taken it and run by now." I told her. I almost laughed.

"Aren't you always teaching me to hold back?" she asked.

"Not on everything."

"But on _some_ things."

I heard the double meaning in her voice and instantly felt bad. I wished we could be together, as I had only how many times before, but it did us no good. God, I loved her, but it wouldn't work. I couldn't let myself love her.

"Of course." I said, not indicating that we'd been talking about anything other than class. I didn't let on that I had picked up the message. "It's like everything else. Balance. Know which things to run forward with—and know which to leave alone." I put emphasis on the last phrase for her.

Our eyes met. She had picked up that I knew what she'd meant before. She knew I picked up on it. But I said nothing more.

Hesitantly, she reached out and curled her hand around the hilt. She studied the stake, and got used to it. Finally she looked up at me and spoke. "What should I do first?" she asked.

We covered the basics, honing the way she held and moved with the stake. I let her attack one of the dummies later on. She discovered it was not as effortless as she thought it was. I never stopped giving her patience and diligence. I guided her through every step, correcting every tiny detail.

"Slide _up_ through the ribs." I explained to her, watching her try to fit the stake through a small gap in the bones. "It'll be easier since you're shorter than most of your attackers. Plus, you can slide along the lower rib's edge."

Practice ended and I took the stake back. I nodded to her, showing my approval.

"Good. Very good." I told her.

She glanced at me, and looked surprised.

"Really?"

"You do it like you've been doing it for years." I told her. She grinned. We both began leaving the practice room. When we neared the door, she stopped and scowled.

"Can I stake that one next time?" she asked.

I picked up my coat, and put it on. I studied the dummy, and I got why she wanted to stake it. It was because it looked like her mother.

"I don't think that'd be happy." I said to her.

"It'd be better than me actually doing it to _her._" She grumbled, slinging her backpack over her shoulder, looking angry. I hated when she was angry, because I wanted to fix whatever had made her angry.

We headed out to the gym.

"Violence isn't the answer to your problems." I told her calmly.

"She's the one with the problem. And I thought the whole point of my education was that violence _is _the answer."

"Only to those who bring it to you first. Your mother isn't assaulting you. You two are just too much alike, that's all." They really were very much alike.

She stopped walking.

"I'm not anything like her! I mean… we kind of have the same eyes. But I'm a lot taller. And my hair's completely different." She pointed to her ponytail, pointing out to me that there were differences. I knew they were different, but they were very much the same.

I hid a smile. "I'm not talking about your appearances, and you know it." I told her, matter-of-factly. She was so stubborn.

She looked away from my gaze.

"You think I'm jealous?" she asked me incredulously.

"Are you?" I asked her. If so, what are you jealous of exactly?"

She glanced at me. "I don't know. Maybe I'm jealous of her reputation. Maybe I'm jealous because she's put more time into her reputation than into me. I don't know." She confessed to me.

"You don't think what she did was great?"

"Yes. No. I don't know. It just sounded like such a… I don't know… like she was bragging. Like she just did it for the glory." She grimaced. "For the marks."

"You think facing down strigoi is worth a few marks? I thought you'd learned something from the Badica house." I told her.

"That's not what I—"

"Come on." I told her.

She froze.

"What?"

"I want to show you something." I informed her.

"What is it?" she asked me, looking confused.

"That not all marks are badges of honor."

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**Review please and thanks!!! Hope you liked it!!! Let me know!!! Thanks!!!  
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**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
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	5. Chapter 5

**Well, hope you like it!!! You know the drill. REVIEW PLEASE!!! I need thoughts to improve my work please!!! Thanks to everyone who's reviewed so far!!! It's a huge inspiration for me!!! It really helps me to want to write. Thanks so much!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
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Even though she had no idea what we were going to do, she followed obediently behind me. I knew she hated secrets, so I kept it from her.

I led her out of the campus boundaries, and into the woods that surrounded the school. There was so much wilderness around the school. There was so much space. They could have built twenty more academies and had space for more.

We walked in silence, just the sounds of our feet crunching the unbroken snow, and the birds singing their songs. Rose had to work to keep up with me, because the snow slowed her down. I kept my fast pace, pretending to be oblivious to her struggles. After a while the cabin came into view. I knew that Rose would be looking it over, confused as to what it was and what it was doing here. I fought the urge to smile.

"What is that?" she asked. I almost smiled.

"Old watch-post. Guardians used to live on the edge of campus and keep watch for strigoi." I informed her. The cabin was dark, and made out of logs. They were worn and rotten, and the roof sagged, but it was livable.

"Why don't they anymore?"

"We don't have enough guardians to staff it. Besides, moroi have warded campus with enough protective magic that most don't think it's necessary to have actual people on guard." But it was necessary. With the recent attack on Art, there was evidence humans were working with the strigoi. And if that was true, they could easily break the wards with a single stake.

We rounded the corner of the building in silence, walking straight into Christian and Lissa. They were skating on a frozen pond with Tasha. Her jet-black hair arced around her when she stopped gracefully. I looked at the scene, while Lissa skated awkwardly over to Rose.

"Rose!" she shouted, and I watched her skate in small and awkward little strides to reach her best friend. Christian glanced at Rose, as if she were an intruder.

"Thanks for inviting me to the party." Rose remarked staring confused and jealously.

"I figured you were busy. And this is secret anyway. We aren't supposed to be here." Lissa stated. Not supposed to be here was an understatement. They would get in serious trouble if they were caught.

Christian skated to where Rose and I stood, soon followed by Tasha Ozera.

"You bringing party crashers, Dimka?" she asked me. I laughed. Rose looked shocked to find that I was laughing.

"It's impossible to keep Rose away from places she shouldn't be. She always finds them eventually." I told Tasha. Even though I was joking, it was pretty true. Rose always found where she wasn't supposed to be. I didn't know how she did it either.

Tasha grinned and turned around, flipping her hair over her shoulder, giving Rose a full on look at her. I knew what she was seeing. She was seeing Tasha's heart-shaped face, with large blue eyes. She was seeing the delicate face, with the pink lips. Tasha never changed. She was always the same.

Rose was also seeing the purple scars that went down Tasha's left cheek. The ones Christian's parents left when they tore out part of it. Christian's parents had gone strigoi by choice and when they came to get him, she protected him, and they fought against her. Guardians had arrived just in time to save her and Christian. Christian would have one day become a strigoi if not for Tasha.

Tasha was Christian's aunt. She offered her gloved hand to Rose.

"Tasha Ozera. I've heard a lot about you, Rose." And with that piece of information, Rose looked at Christian dangerously.

Tasha laughed.

"Don't worry. It was all good."

"No it wasn't," he countered.

Tasha shook her head, exasperated. "Honestly, I don't know where he got such horrible social skills. He didn't learn them from me." she spoke the truth. Tasha was nice, and kind to everyone around her.

"What are you guys doing out here?" Rose asked them.

"I wanted to spend some time with these two," she frowned. "But I don't really like hanging around the school itself. They aren't always hospitable… because… of what happened…" she trailed off.

Everyone fell silent for a moment.

"That's the way it is." Tasha said, and shrugged. She rubbed her hands together and exhaled, telling everyone she was cold subtly. "But let's not stand out here, not when we can build a fire inside." She began walking, and everyone else followed her inside.

The cabin was dusty and dirty, but better than nothing. I glanced at Rose, who was inspecting it, while Tasha lit a fire. A bag of marshmallows was produced, and we sat and cooked them over the flames. Tasha and I spoke, as did Lissa and Christian, but Rose silently sat and watched as Tasha and I laughed and reminisced.

"So are you coming on the ski trip?" Rose asked Tasha.

She nodded, stifled a yawn and stretched. "I haven't been skiing in ages. No time. Been saving all my vacation for this."

"Vacation?" Rose looked at her, curiosity written all over her face. I smiled. "Do you have… a job?" Rose asked curiously.

"Sadly, yes." Tasha loved her job, but she needed more time off. "I teach martial arts classes." And she loved every minute of it. She was very good at it.

Rose was astonished. I knew what she was thinking. Most royal moroi didn't work, but Tasha was different.

"What do you think, Rose? Think you could take her?" Christian asked Rose, amused at her surprise.

"Hard to say," she said. I knew Rose _could_ take Tasha down, but I didn't speak up yet. Rose was tough. Some novices couldn't do what she could. She was at the top of her combat classes. She had surpassed everyone else. I wasn't surprised. She could do more if she put her mind to it.

Tasha grinned at Rose. "You're being modest. I've seen what you guys can do. This is just a hobby I picked up."

I chuckled. "Now _you're _being modest. You could teach half the classes around here." I told her. I smiled.

"Not likely. It'd be pretty embarrassing to be beaten up by a bunch of teenagers." She said. I almost laughed again.

"I don't think that'd happen. I seem to remember you doing some damage to Neil Szelsky." I reminded her, remembering the occasion myself.

Tasha rolled her eyes. "Throwing my drink in his face wasn't actually damage—unless you consider the damage it did to his suit. And we all know how he is about his clothes." She joked. We laughed together.

"Did you start learning to fight before or after that happened to your face?" Rose's control slipped. How could she ask that? It was so rude! But Tasha didn't seem bothered. That was Tasha.

"Rose!" Lissa hissed.

Christian didn't seem upset either, which surprised even me.

"After. How much do you know?" Sadness began to radiate off of Tasha, though her gaze, nor voice, never faltered. No one really knew much about that night. No one but the guardians, Christian, Tasha, and the people they've told.

Rose glanced at Christian. "The basics."

Tasha nodded. "I knew… I knew what Lucas and Moira had become, but that still didn't prepare me. Mentally, physically, or emotionally. I think if I had to live through it again, I still wouldn't be ready. But after that night, I looked at myself—figuratively—and realized how defenseless I was. I'd spent my whole life expecting guardians to protect me and take care of me.

"And that's not to say the guardians aren't capable. Like I said, you could probably take me in a fight. But they—Lucas and Moira—cut down our two guardians before we realized what had happened. I stalled them from taking Christian—but just barely. If the others hadn't showed up, I'd be dead and he'd—" she stopped, frowning. "I decided that I didn't want to die that way, not without putting up a real fight and doing everything I could to protect myself and those I love. So I learned all sorts of self-defense. And after a while, I didn't really, uh, fit in so well with high society around here. So I moved to Minneapolis and made a living from teaching others."

Silence fell over our little group. She told us funny stories for the rest of our time there with her, and I could see Rose was starting to like her. That was good. I really liked Tasha. Not in the way I liked Rose, but as a friend. I loved Rose, but I liked Tasha. Tasha could maybe… distract me. Make me forget about Rose. It was worth a shot.

We were all laughing when Tasha suddenly looked at her watch.

"Where's the best place a girl can go shopping around here?" she asked, probably to Rose and Lissa mainly, since they were the only other girls here.

Lissa and Rose looked at each other. "Missoula." They said in unison.

Tasha sighed. "That's a couple of hours away, but if I leave soon, I can probably still get in some time before the stores close. I'm hopelessly behind in Christmas shopping." She announced.

"I'd kill to go shopping," Rose groaned.

"Me too." concluded Lissa.

"Maybe we could sneak along…" Rose looked at me hopefully.

"No." I told her immediately, not giving her any hope. Rose sighed.

Tasha yawned again. "I'll have to grab some coffee, so I don't sleep on the drive in."

"Can't one of your guardians drive for you?" Rose asked Tasha. Tasha didn't have any guardians.

Tasha shook her head. "I don't have any."

"Don't have any…" she frowned. "You don't have any guardians?"

"Nope." Tasha told her.

Rose shot up. "But that's not possible! You're royal. You should have at least one. Two, really." Rose told her.

"The Ozera's aren't exactly first in line when guardians get assigned," Christian informed her bitterly. It wasn't fair to them, they were good people. They shouldn't be judged for something _someone else_ in their family did.

"But that's not fair. They can't punish you for what your parents did." Rose announced to the room.

"It's not a punishment, Rose. It's just a rearranging of priorities." Tasha told Rose calmly. Rose seemed outraged. I was angered too, because the Ozera's should have guardians.

"They're leaving you defenseless. You can't go out there by yourself!" Rose was almost shouting now.

"I'm not defenseless, Rose. I've told you that. And if I really wanted a guardian, I could make a nuisance of myself, but it's a lot of hassle. I'm fine for now."

I glanced at her. I had an idea. "You want me to go with you?" I offered.

"And keep you up all night?" Tasha shook her head. She was too nice. "I wouldn't do that to you, Dimka."

"He doesn't mind," Rose jumped in. She seemed excited at my idea. I knew she'd approve. I almost smiled.

"I really don't," I informed Tasha. It was true. I didn't. It'd be a nice change of pace.

Tasha hesitated. "All right. But we should probably go soon."

Our group separated. Lissa, Christian, and Tasha went one way, Rose and I another. Tasha and I'd made plans to meet in a half hour.

"So what do you think of her?" I asked Rose when we were finally alone.

"I like her. She's cool." Rose told me, sincerely. No one could hate Tasha. She thought for a moment. "And I get what you mean about the marks."

"Oh?"

Rose nodded, watching her footing, because of the icy ground. The ice hurt to trip on.

"She didn't do what she did for glory. She did it because she had to. Just like… just like my mom did." She admitted. I was proud of her for her conclusion. "The marks don't matter. _Molnijas _or scars." She deduced.

"You're a fast learner," I approved.

"Why does she call you Dimka?" I'd already known that one was coming when Tasha first called me her nickname.

I laughed.

"It's a nickname for Dimitri." I told her.

"That doesn't make any sense. It doesn't sound anything like Dimitri. You should be called, I don't know, Dimi or something."

"That's not how it works in Russian," I said.

"Russian's weird." She announced. I almost laughed.

"So is English." I told her.

She gave me a sly look. "If you'd teach me to swear in Russian, I might have a new appreciation for it." That wasn't happening, no matter how much she begged me. I loved her, but it was something I wouldn't encourage.

"You swear too much already," I told her, which was completely true. She really did swear all the time, it was her constant.

"I just want to express myself."

"Oh, Roza…" I sighed. "You express yourself more than anyone else I know."

Rose smiled, and walked in silence for a moment.

"You know, there's something funny about Tasha's scars." She told me.

"What's that?" I asked.

"The scars… they mess up her face," she began, I guessed having trouble putting thoughts into words. "I mean, it's obvious she used to be really pretty. But even with the scars now… I don't know. She's pretty in a different way. It's like… like they're part of her. They complete her." That was true. Rose was very insightful.

I didn't say anything for a moment. I was proud of her. She knew. She was so insightful.

"You're a fast learner, Roza."

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**Hope you liked it!!! Let me know, review please!!! Thanks!!! I'll update soon!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry about the long time no update. I lost my copy of the book!!! It's a crime, I know!!! Lol. Well, I found it now, so it's all good. Anyway, here's the next chapter. Dimitri wasn't in this chapter, so I made my own chapter!!! Yay me!!! Enjoy!!! Review please!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**

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Tasha met me when she said she would, she was very reliable. We got in the car and I drove her to the mall, so she could do some shopping. Shopping wasn't something I particularly enjoyed, but I'd do it.

On the way in, Tasha and I reminisced about old friends. She was up to date with a lot of them, and was very aware of what they did. When we pulled up in the mall's parking lot, we were laughing about one of our old acquaintances.

Tasha and I walked into the mall lighthearted, and when I started to take the further away guardian position Tasha laughed and stopped me.

"Dimka, where are you going? You're staying with me!" she laughed. I obeyed happily. Tasha and I were close friends; it had always been effortless with her.

She stopped in clothes stores, chatting the whole way. We talked and laughed, catching up. We'd barely talked in years. We had gone our different ways, other than the occasional letter or phone call.

We shared even the most intimate details of our lives since we had last talked. The only things I left out were Lissa's power, and my feelings for Rose. No one could know about those things, not even Tasha.

In a clothes store, she held up a red dress, with flowers embroidered on it.

"It's nice." I told her, not knowing what she wanted me to say.

"For Rose, Dimka. What do you think? You know her better than I do." She was asking my opinion for a gift for Rose. I gave the dress another look, and I pictured Rose in it. That was a mistake. In my mind, I imagined her wearing it. She was stunning.

"Yeah, she'll love it." I admitted. Tasha took it up to the checkout and bought it without hesitation.

"Well, now she'll have it." she smiled. I took the bag from her, as I had with all the others. I had an armful of bags, and Tasha was looking done.

"I'm done shopping. Do you want to get something to eat? I'm starved." She pulled me off toward the food court. We got something to eat, and sat down at a small plastic table. I set the bags down beside me.

"Dimka, I've been thinking. I want a guardian." She spoke. She should have a guardian.

"You should have one, it's only fair. Tasha, yes, get a guardian." I encouraged. She hesitated for a moment.

"Dimka, I want you to be my guardian." She informed me, looking anxious. I wondered what she was thinking.

"I don't know…" I paused.

"Think it over, okay?" she looked worried. I nodded, reaching for a lighter topic to talk about. I came up with nothing.

"I'm ready to leave." She said standing up, and throwing the remnants of her food away. I stood, copying her motions. I picked the bags back up, and we walked to the car hurriedly.

We reached the car and put the bags in the trunk. We got in, and pulled away, ready to go and get some sleep. I was exhausted.

We drove, talking about whatever came to mind. The ride home wasn't awkward; Tasha had a way of making everyone comfortable around her.

We pulled into the academy. I grabbed Tasha's bags, and walked her to her cabin. I put her bags inside and said goodbye. Walking to my room, I ran into Janine Hathaway.

"Belikov. I'm taking over your training session with Rose tomorrow, you should get some sleep." She stated. I nodded reluctantly. I didn't want to lose my time with Rose, but I needed to sleep. I was so tired.

"Thanks, Guardian Hathaway." I walked away, toward my room.

I opened the door, and dropped into my bed, ready to sleep, but I knew I needed a shower. I got into the shower, thinking about Tasha's offer. Thinking about Rose.

Maybe Tasha could make me forget Rose. Get me away from here. Away from temptation. It was something to try, that was for sure. When I stepped out of the shower, I was ready to drop. I got dressed in pajama bottoms, and I walked over to bed. I turned off my bedside light, and dreamt of Rose. God, I loved her so much it hurt.

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**Hope you liked it!!! Sorry about the delay!!! Review please!!! Thanks!!! I'll update soon, I promise!!! Anyway, thanks for reading!!!  
~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**


	7. Chapter 7

**Again, no Dimitri in this chapter. I wasn't sure what to write about though, so I just wrote this. Hope you like it. Sorry it's so short!!! Fast update, huh?**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~  
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I dreamt dreams of Rose. I dreamt when we were under the lust spell. I remembered the night so well. She just showed up at my room, in that black dress. That damn black dress. I sighed and rolled over. I looked at the clock. It was about time to wake up. School had started a few hours ago. I groaned and got out of bed. I went to take a shower, and last night's events rushed back to me. Tasha's offer.

When I got out of the shower, I straightened up my room, and went off to start the day. I started the day by talking to the other guardians, wondering if I had missed anything while I had slept.

Talking to one guardian, I found that Rose had been to the clinic again. I worried, I wondered if it was anything serious, and by the end of the school day I found she had been released. So nothing too serious.

I had patrol, so I walked to meet the guardian on duty. They walked off, and I took their post. I watched, but nothing happened. Nothing ever happened.

I thought of Rose and Tasha. Tasha and I could have a family. Rose and I couldn't. I could give up Rose if I was doing good for the world, couldn't I? For a family. And maybe, over time I could forget Rose and love Tasha like I loved Rose, right?

When it was time to be relieved of my post I had gotten nothing done. I walked back to my room, and fell into bed for another sleepless night.

I waited until it was time for practice for Rose.

Because that was all I looked forward to anymore.

That was all that kept me going. So how could I leave her for Tasha, when I loved her so much? It was for her own good, I reminded myself. Even so, how could I break her heart? How could I stand to hear of her loving someone else?

I didn't know the answers to any of these questions, but I did know that I had to decide soon, because Tasha was leaving in a few weeks. And I would either go with her or stay behind with Rose.

This would be the hardest decision of my life. Because either way I would hurt. Either way, I would hurt the people around me. And with way, I would disappoint someone.

What would I do? I sighed and slipped into a dreamless sleep.

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**I've already started on the next chapter, I'm making up for the missed time. Two chapters in an hour!!! Go me, I'm on a roll!!! Anyway, review please, they make me happy. Thanks for reading!!! Sorry it was so short, Dimitri's actually in the next chapter, so it **_**should**_** be longer. If I keep going like this, it should be up tonight!!! Well, hope you liked it!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay, here it is!!! I know, fast updates!!! Anyway review please!!! Hope you like it!!! I'll update more tomorrow!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**

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I woke to my alarm clock blaring. I rolled over and jumped out of bed. I was going to see Rose. I got a shower, and dressed for practice. It hadn't taken me long, and I'd beat Rose there, she was never there early.

I started my walk to the gym, and met no one along the way. When I got there, Rose was already there, to my surprise. She looked happy.

All of the sudden she averted her face, so I couldn't see her straight on. But she looked fine. I wondered why she had been in the clinic yesterday.

We returned to the training room with dummies for stake practicing. I told her to continue what we had been doing the other day. She did. She had so much anger this morning, I realized watching her practice. I ignored it, and just critiqued her performance, and gave her tips.

"Your hair's in the way," I said after letting it go on long enough. Too long actually. Her anger had built up. "Not only are you blocking your peripheral vision, you're running the risk of letting your enemy get a handhold." I informed her.

"If I'm actually in a fight, I'll wear it up." She grunted defiantly, while shoving the stake between the dummy's artificial ribs. She added extra force suddenly. "I'm just wearing it down today, that's all." She told me.

"Rose," I warned. She ignored me. She plunged the stake again. "_Rose._ Stop." I warned her even more sharply.

She responded. She backed away, breathing heavily. She hit the wall, and looked away from me, her eyes on the ground.

"Look at me." I ordered her. She didn't look up from the ground.

"Dimitri—" I cut her off.

"Look at me." I demanded. She hesitated. But she couldn't refuse a direct order, I was her instructor. She slowly turned to me, tilting her head slightly, so her hair covered her face.

I got up from my chair, walking over and standing in front of her.

She still avoided my eyes, but my hand rose to brush back her hair. When I saw the black eye, my hand froze. There was no noise. We had both stopped breathing, I noted.

My hand hovered stupidly. Why had I touched her hair in the first place? I scolded myself mentally. I pulled my hand from her soft hair, reluctantly, and pressed it to my side.

Her face fell.

She tipped her head back, so that we made eye contact for the first time this session. Her hair fell from her face. My hand trembled, and I resisted the urge to reach out to her. I stopped the shaking in my hand, knowing she had noticed.

"Does it hurt?" I asked her.

"No," she was lying to me. I knew it, but I didn't call her out on it. I didn't want her to close up on me, not now.

"It doesn't look so bad. It'll heal." I told her. I hated that she had it. And I had the rising suspicion that her mother had done it in the practice session I had missed.

"I hate her." Her voice sounded like it wasn't her own anymore. My suspicion confirmed in one sentence. Her voice contained so much venom in those words.

"No, you don't," I said gently. I didn't want to upset her more. I just wanted her to go back to being my Roza. No, I chided myself. She wasn't mine. She would _never _be mine. I reminded myself.

"I _do."_ She told me. No, I thought. Roza was too good to hate. She couldn't hate. No.

"You don't have time to hate anyone," I advised, my voice still keeping the kind tone. "Not in our profession. You should make peace with her." I saw her darken, and knew that I had said the wrong thing.

"Make peace with her? After she gave me a black eye _on purpose! _Why am I the only one who sees how crazy that is?" I didn't think Janine had done it on purpose, but I didn't know. I would talk to her about it later. After this.

"She absolutely did _not _do it on purpose," I said, my voice hard. "No matter how much you resent her, you have to believe that. She wouldn't do that, and anyway, I saw her later that day. She was worried about you." I lied smoothly. I had to tell her something that would calm her down. Lying was better than seeing my Roza unhappy. No, I reprimanded myself. Not my Roza. Just Roza. Rose.

"Probably more worried someone will bring her up on child abuse charges," she grumbled. I repressed the urge to sigh. Sometimes Rose was so difficult!

"Don't you think this is the time of year for forgiveness?" I mean, it was Christmas after all.

Rose sighed loudly. "This isn't a Christmas special! This is my life. In the real world, miracles and goodness just don't happen." She was so hell bent on hating her mother, I thought. Maybe I should just let her. No, I decided a moment later. No.

I eyed her, keeping my emotions contained. I hoped they didn't leak out onto my face. "In the real world, you can make your own miracles." I pointed out.

Something inside of her seemed to snap, or maybe she just let go of her control.

"Okay, can you just stop this for once?" she demanded, hands on her hips. What the hell did she mean? Stop what?

"Stop what?" I demanded.

"The whole profound Zen crap thing. You don't talk to me like a real person. Everything you say is just some wise, life-lesson nonsense. You really do sound like a Christmas special." She was taking her anger out on me. Since when was there so much darkness in my Roza? This time, I didn't scold myself for calling her my Roza. "I swear, sometimes it's just like you want to hear yourself talk! And I _know _you're not always this way. You were perfectly normal when you talked to Tasha. But with me? You're just going through the motions. You don't care about me. You're just stuck in your stupid mentor role."

I didn't care about her!? I was silently outraged. I cared about her more than she knew. I cared about her more than I should. I cared about her so much it hurt.

I stared at her, feeling my surprise slip out onto my face. "I don't care about you?" I asked her. She couldn't actually think that. No, she couldn't, could she?

"No." she was being nasty. What had happened to her? She must know the truth—that I _did _care and was more than just a mentor, or I wanted to be. I wanted to be able to love her, but she was my student. I couldn't. Not yet. We were going to guard Vasilisa together. I couldn't love her. No.

She jabbed my chest with her finger. "I'm another student to you. You just go on and on with your stupid life lessons so that—" I grew frustrated at watching her rant. She was just going on and on. It just kept coming, and coming, and coming. Just standing by and letting it work its way out of her system wouldn't work.

The hand I had used earlier to brush her hair from her face reached up and grabbed the finger she had jabbed into my chest. I pinned it to the wall in frustration.

_"Don't _tell me what I'm feeling," I growled. _I _didn't know how I was feeling, not anymore, so she couldn't. I loved her, but I couldn't. It was a forbidden love. I couldn't love her. Not now.

"That's it, isn't it?" she asked, snapping me out of my heated anger

"What?" I asked.

"You're always fighting for control. You're the same as me." how could she know that. Rose was so smart. I _was_ always fighting for control. I _was _the same as she was.

"No," I said, still worked up. "I've learned my control." I was desperate to hide the truth. Rose was scaring me. She could see right through me, as if I were glass.

"No," She informed me. "You haven't. You put on a good face, and most of the time you do stay in control. But sometimes you can't. And sometimes …" she leaned forward, lowering her voice. "Sometimes you don't want to." She knew everything I hid. And it scared me. She read me like an open book, and she was just a child.

"Rose…"

My breathing was labored I noticed. My heart was beating so fast. Yet, I wasn't pulling away, not as I should have. But before I had the chance to pull away her lips were on mine. I kissed her back, feeling the electric connection. I pressed closer to her, still grasping her hand. She was trapped between the wall and me. My other hand snaked behind her neck and into her hair. We kissed passionately.

No. She was my student. I realized. My whole body wanted me to keep kissing her, and half of my mind was screaming at me not to mess this up, but the other half, it was screaming at me to pull away.

I pulled away. I jerked my hand from hers, and took a few steps back. I was more than shaken. I was terrified, exhilarated, and I wanted more. But no, not with her. Why the hell did I have to fall in love with _her?_ Why not Tasha?

"Do _not _do that again," I said stiffly.

"Don't kiss me back then," she retorted.

I stared at her for a long time.

"I don't give 'Zen lessons' to hear myself talk. I don't give them because you're another student. I'm doing this to teach you control." I told her. I wasn't just trying to convince her. I was trying to convince me. I didn't want her to learn control.

"You're doing a great job," she said bitterly.

I shut my eyes for a moment, exhaled, and muttered to myself in Russian. I didn't dare to look at her again; I just turned and left the room.

* * *

**So what did you think? I hope you liked it!!! Review please!!! Wow, three updates in less than three hours!!! How awesome, huh? Lol. Thanks for reading!!! I'll update more tomorrow, I'm taking a break for now!!!**

**~~~333RoseHathaway-Belikov333~~~**


	9. Chapter 9

**I SUCK. I KNOW. I am SO SORRY for the long wait!!! I really just haven't been in the mood to right. I got kinda depressed, and the school year started, I had to deal with making new friends, and adjusting to the whole new school. God, it's been forever. I PROMISE to update sooner.**

**Now that I'm done with all the dumb excuses. **

**You can go ahead and email complaints and ideas to . You should follow me on Twitter. My twitter name is KatrynaWilliams.**

**SO SORRY. I really am. I'll try to update a TON MORE!!!**

Nine

That kiss Rose and I had shared, I hadn't been able to forget it.

I was afraid if I saw her again, she would try something like that again. So I sent her a message later that very day.

_Rose,_

_I'm cancelling our next two lessons, because of the quickly approaching plans to leave campus._

_Guardian Belikov_

I felt bad for cancelling, but I needed a break, time to clear my head… thoughts of Rose swirled through my mind. I knew it was wrong, and I knew she'd see through my transparent excuse. But I was okay with that, I just _couldn't_ see her again until I could clear my head.

I had kissed her back. I had… and I had liked it. That girl drove me to the edges of my mind, to a place where I didn't have self control. A place where she could see through me. And it scared me that she knew me so well.

I needed to be more in control then she was, she was a girl, a mere seventeen years old.

I fell asleep after a long night of thought. It was hard to sleep for the next few days. Christmas morning, I woke early to take the morning shift, before the Christmas brunch.

I still didn't have my thoughts about Rose in order. Not yet. I was getting closer, and closer every day. Yet, I wasn't close enough.

When I got back from my shift, I got a quick shower, letting the warm water wash away my thoughts. I dressed in my jeans and boots, but I put on a black sweater. I tied back my hair, thinking about how I needed to look nice. Not like I had just gotten off duty.

Tasha pulled me aside when I arrived.

"Have you thought about my offer, Dimka?" she inquired.

I shook my head bluntly. "I haven't made a decision yet, Tasha. Soon, I promise. I will tell you, soon."

Rose arrived shortly after I did. Trying to not call attention to the fact I was ignoring her, I threw myself into conversation with Tasha. I watched as she stood, listening. To be honest, I hated talking to Tasha, sometimes. It was so _predictable._

She had been talking about someone we both knew, I realized when I snapped back into reality.

"You know that Jack had five kids?" she asked. I had missed a good part of the conversation, but I jumped in easily.

"Five? I hadn't heard that," I said, though I really had heard. Just roll with it, I told myself.

Tasha nodded to me. "It's insane. I swear, I don't think his wife's had more than six months off between kids. She's short, too— so she just gets wider and wider."

"When I first met him, he swore he didn't even want kids," I said, honestly.

Her eyes widened excitedly. "I _know! _I can't believe it. You should see him now. He just melts around them. I can't even understand him half the time. I swear, he speaks more baby talk than English."

I forced a smile. "Well…children do that to people."

"I can't imagine it happening to _you," _she laughed. "You're always so stoic. Of course … I suppose you'd be doing baby talk in Russian, so no one would ever know."

I laughed, but was deep in my own mind. Children. I could imagine Rose having children, and loving them… Rose? No, I scolded myself. No.

Lissa went to give Rose a gift. I watched Rose open her gift, her face full of wonder.

"What the …" she whispered.

She lifted the beads out, and a heavy gold crucifix swung from the end of them. It was almost like the princess wanted Rose to become a Christian.

"Are you trying to convert me?" Rose asked, confused. I stifled a laugh, covering it as a smile. Tasha laughed, but I had no idea at what.

"Flip it over," Lissa said to Rose.

She obeyed without question or some comment that would make her friend mad.

"It's a family heirloom," Lissa told her. "One of my dad's good friends has been saving boxes of his stuff. This was in it. It belonged to my great-grandmother's guardian."

"Liss …" Rose choked out, clearly touched. The "I can't… you can't give me something like this."

"Well, I certainly can't keep it. It's meant for a guardian. My guardian," Vasilisa explained, looking at Rose happily.

"You know," Rose began, "there's a good possibility I'll get kicked out of school before I can become your guardian."

Lissa grinned. "Well, then you can give it back."

Everyone laughed, so I joined in. Tasha started to say something, then stopped when she looked up at a figure emerging from the door.

"Janine!"

Janine Hathaway stood in the door, stiff and awkward looking. She frowned.

"Sorry I'm late," she said. "I had business to take care of."

Janine joined in the conversation. Everyone but Rose and I seemed to pay attention.

"Well, decapitations aren't as easy as they seem," Janine informed us. I knew this already, I thought to myself. "You've got to get through the spinal cord and tendons."

Mason, Rose's _boyfriend,_ jumped into the conversation. I didn't like him very much. I felt jealous that he could be with her without consequence. "What's the best weapon to do it with?"

Janine thought for a moment. "An axe. You can get more weight behind it." She made a swinging motion, as if she were holding an axe.

"Cool," he said. "Man, I hope they let me carry an axe."

I almost laughed again, at the stupidity of this young novice. Axes were not very convenient to carry. The conversation carried on.

Rose left with her friends, and Janine followed her daughter. I assumed to talk to her, but I really wasn't sure.

After bidding Tasha a good night, I followed stealthily.

"You want to, um, go to my room?" Rose asked. I had gotten there not quite early enough to hear the whole conversation.

Janine froze for a moment. "Sure."

Rose led her to her room, and I walked back to my own. Spying was wrong… I shouldn't have. But there was something that made me curious.


	10. Chapter 10

**I updated quickly!!! Go me!!! I'm on a roll. I'll DEFINITELY be updating more often. I've got some free time. Not a lot, but the friend I spend most of my time with is being a bitch lately, so we'll see what happens.**

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* * *

Rose was avoiding me. That I was sure of. Which made it really easy to avoid her. I assumed she had heard about the offer Tasha had given me. Her mother knew, and they had been talking.

The ski trip came quickly, and I was ready to go. I felt like I wanted to talk to Rose, but I pushed the thought out of my head.

I got onto one of the jets late on the day after Christmas. I sat in a seat, and Tasha soon came to sit beside me. I had just wanted to sit alone, but had predicted this.

I watched Rose walk down the aisle, pass Christian and Lissa, and walk back to Mason. Her _boyfriend. _ Jealousy surged through me, and I scolded myself. She had every right to be with him. I was going to leave. I would take the offer.

When I looked back, Mason's hand was over Rose's, their fingers laced together. I felt my jaw tighten.

"Dimka, what's wrong?" Tasha worried.

I looked at her dismissively. "I'm just restless, Tasha. Don't worry."

We made small talk, until we reached the resort. It was large, three stories, and was built like a log cabin. The windows were tinted, and lanterns hung around the place.

Mountains were easy to spot, they were everywhere. I sighed and walked into the luxurious building, losing sight of Rose in the enormous crowd.

The lobby's ceiling had a chandelier hanging over us, and the floor was marble Everything was red, blood shade, and a spicy scent of flowers filled the air. Tasha came up beside me.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" she remarked. I nodded slowly.

I made my way to my room, where accommodations were amazing. I relaxed on the king-sized mattress and wondered about Rose. How was she doing? What was she doing? I knew she roomed with the princess. They were probably talking.

Eventually I wondered outside. Rose and Mason were on skis.

My stomach twisted when Rose went at a high speed and jumped over a ridge. After a neatly executed hairpin turn, and dodged trees, she landed safely. I breathed a sigh of relief. She was okay.

Her boyfriend went to imitate her, and got about halfway before his skis caught and his legs twisted. He fell. I began to set after them, but some staff beat me to it. I stood back.

The look on Rose's face told me she was being yelled at. I resisted the urge to grin.

She disappeared eventually, deep in thought. I followed her, something in my gut told me too.

She was talking to a Moroi, Adrian Ivashkov, I realized. He was shorter than I was, and wore a long coat. He wore leather shoes, and his brown hair was unkempt. His eyes were stunningly green, and he smiled at Rose. He looked her over.

"You smell good, you know," Adrian Ivashkov told Rose. I was about to jump out and take him then and there, screw him being a royal Moroi. No one talks to my Roza like that. No, I told myself. Did I just call her mine?

She looked puzzled. "I… um, what?"

"You smell good," he told her. I stepped forward, almost out of the buses.

"Are you joking? I've been sweating all day. I'm disgusting," walk away, Roza. Just walk away, I begged her mentally. But she couldn't hear.

"Sweat isn't a bad thing. Some of the best things in life happen while sweating. Yeah, if you get too much of it and it gets old and stale, it turns pretty gross. But on a beautiful woman? Intoxicating. If you could smell things like a vampire does, you'd know what I'm talking about. Most people mess it all up and drown themselves in perfume. Perfume can be good…especially if you get one that goes with your chemistry. But you only need a hint. Mix about 20 percent of that with 80 percent of your own perspiration…mmm," Ivashkov tilted his head to the side, and at least ten ways to snap his neck rushed through my mind."Dead sexy."

"Well, thanks for the hygiene lesson," she said. "But I don't own any perfume, _and _I'm going to go shower all this hot sweaty action off me. Sorry." Good girl, I thought. Yes.

Then Ivashkov produced cigarettes and offered one to Rose. She shook her head, and he took one out.

Get away, Roza. Go. Now, I wished. At least she hadn't been smoking, I thought to myself. I didn't kiss smokers… what was I thinking? I stopped my train of thought in its tracks.

She watched him light it. "Bad habit."

"One of many," he said, shrugging. "You here with St. Vlad's?"

"Yup," come on, Roza, just leave. _Before_ I snap this Moroi's neck. Please, I thought, using all of my willpower to stay hidden.

"So you're going to be a guardian when you grow up."

"Obviously."

"How long until you grow up? I might need a guardian."

That was the wrong thing to say, I smiled faintly at Rose's expression.

"I graduate in the spring. But I'm already spoken for. Sorry."

"Yeah? Who is he?"

_"She's _Vasilisa Dragomir."

I nodded to myself. Good girl.

"Ah," he grinned. "I knew you were trouble as soon as I saw you. You're Janine Hathaway's daughter."

She flinched. "I'm Rose Hathaway."

"Nice to meet you, Rose Hathaway."

"Adrian Ivashkov."

"And you think _I'm _trouble," something clicked in her mind. Adrian laughed.

"Handy, huh? Each of our reputations precedes us."

Rose shook her head vigorously. "You don't know anything about me. And I only know of your _family. _I don't know anything about you."

"Want to?"

"Sorry. I'm not into older guys."

That made me think. I watched the pair intently.

"I'm twenty-one. Not that much older."

If he made another move on Roza, I would step out and hit him. Consequences be damned, she wasn't his.

"I have a boyfriend," she said, and I flinched. A pang of jealousy.

"Funny you didn't mention that right away. He didn't give you that black eye, did he?"

"He wouldn't be alive if he did. I got it during … practice. I mean, I'm training to be a guardian. Our classes are always rough."

"That's pretty hot," Ivashkov said. I wanted to punch this guy more and more. I was going to do something stupid, if this went on much longer.

"Punching me in the eye?"

"Well, no. Of course not. I meant that the idea of getting rough with you is hot. I'm a big fan of full-contact sports."

This was not good for my self control. The way he talked to Roza, the way he talked _down_ to her, it made me want to break his neck.

"I'm sure you are," Rose frowned.

Mia, Rose's arch enemy walked up behind her. She smirked.

"Hey, Mia."

She looked from Adrian to Rose.

_"Another _guy?" she asked, incredulously.

"Mia, this is Adrian Ivashkov," she introduced the two of them. I felt myself frown.

Adrian shook Mia's hand. "Always a pleasure to meet a friend of Rose's, especially a pretty one." "We aren't friends," Rose told him.

"Rose only hangs out with guys and psychopaths," said Mia.

"Well," Adrian grinned, "since I'm both a psychopath and a guy, that would explain why we're such good friends."

"You and I aren't friends either," Rose said pointedly.

He laughed smirking. "Always playing hard to get, huh?"

"She's not that hard to get," said Mia. "Just ask half the guys at our school."

"Yeah," Rose began, "and you can ask the other half about Mia. If you can do a favor for her, she'll do _lots _of favors for you."

"Well," she said, "at least I don't do them for free."

I heard Adrian meow. He was an arrogant royal, and nothing more, I told myself, over and over.

"Are you done?" Rose retorted. "It's past your bedtime, and the grown-ups would like to talk now."

Adrian watched in amusement, the royal had nothing better to do. If he didn't stop hanging out with Rose, he wouldn't be quite so pretty anymore.

"Sure," Mia smiled. "I have better things to do anyway." She turned toward the door, then paused with her hand resting on the wooden frame. "Her mom gave her that black eye, you know."

Adrian lit another cigarette. "Your mom?"

"Shut up." Rose said, not looking at him.

"You're one of those people who either has soul mates or mortal enemies, aren't you? No in-between. You and Vasilisa are probably like sisters, huh?" he pressed. I grimaced, waiting for Rose's answer.

"I guess."

"How is she?"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

Adrian shrugged. "I don't know. I mean, I know you guys ran away…and there was that stuff with her family and Victor Dashkov…."

Rose stiffened, noticeably. "So?"

"Dunno. Just figured it might be a lot for her to, you know, handle," Adrian poked around.

I began to walk out, to rescue her. But then she said the most glorious thing in the world…

"I've got to go."

"Are you sure? I thought it was time for the grown-ups to talk. Lots of grown-up things I'd like to talk about."

"It's late, I'm tired, and your cigarettes are giving me a headache," Rose shrugged.

I was tempted to break a few fingers of his, so he couldn't light those cigarettes anymore. Instead I turned and walked away. It was hard for me to do, to leave Rose like that.

I reached my room. Tasha was waiting outside of it.

"Out for a walk?" she guessed. I nodded.

You could say that.

* * *

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	11. Chapter 11

**It's short. There wasn't really much to write. Sorry about that. I'll update soon.**

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**Twitter me, my name's KatrynaWilliams**

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I laid in my bed, drifting in and out of sleep. Thoughts of Rose came whether I was awake or asleep.

Finally, I glanced over at the clock. And hour until I was on duty. I got up anyway, and pulled on clothes. Much longer of doing this, and I would probably do something stupid.

I walked to post, to relieve the current guard. I ran into another guardian, whose name escaped me.

"Guardian Belikov!" she called, her short blonde hair shaking. "There's been another attack."  
I felt my eyes widen in momentary surprise. Oh god.

"We're meeting in Guardian Hathaway's room," she pointed. "I have to go round up the rest of the guardians…"

I nodded and set off. Another attack. I reached the room.

"What happened?" I demanded of Janine Hathaway.

She looked at me.

"Eight Moroi and their five guardians killed. Three Moroi missing," she said. "The Drozdovs. In northern California. The wards were broken. There had to be humans, and more than a few Strigoi. They're banding together."

I swore in Russian.

"Belikov!" Alberta called me. "We're here to discuss strategy. We need some help."

"We need to have more guards, constant double posts. We need to call more guardians here, and Moroi who need protection. Better to gather here—" one guardian began.

"No. This changes everything," I spoke. "Everything we know has changed completely. There had to have been more than half a dozen."

"That's not normal," Guardian Hathaway pointed out.

I nodded.

"So what do we do?" the female guardian from before asked.

"We prepare. What else can we do?" a voice said.

We did have to prepare.

A group of us broke off to discuss strategy. The news had already gotten out, we didn't have much time before the entire resort was in a full on panic.

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	12. Chapter 12

**I updated as quickly as I could.**

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The door was left open, and guardians walked in and out. Finally, I saw Rose and Lissa walk in. I glanced at her, but she looked away. I understood why.

Janine was explaining for the seventh time.

"There had to be more than last time," said Guardian Hathaway.

"More?" one guardian asked, alarmed. "That last group was unheard of. I still can't believe nine Strigoi managed to work together—you expect me to believe they managed to get more organized still?"

"Yes," Janine snapped. She looked a little more like Rose when she was irritated.

"Any evidence of humans?" someone else wondered.

Janine froze for a second, wondering if she should say what she was with her daughter in the room. "Yes. More broken wards. And the way it was all conducted…it's identical to the Badica attack."

Janine looked at the records on her clipboard, looking at nothing. There were no details, nothing new to report. And it was making me anxious. Strigoi banding together could be fatal to the world as we know it. "They don't have forensic details yet, but the same number of Strigoi couldn't have done this. None of the Drozdovs or their staff escaped. With five guardians, seven Strigoi would have been preoccupied—at least temporarily—for some to escape. We're looking at nine or ten, maybe."

"Janine's right," I spoke. "And if you look at the venue…it's too big. Seven couldn't have covered it."

On the outside, I acted cool, calm, but I let Janine and the others take control. No one knew what to do, and I couldn't afford to make a wrong call. I was still young, compared to some other guardians, and they were more experienced. They seemed to know what to do, while I was standing there, pretending it was all okay.

"First Badicas, now Drozdovs," one guardian mumbled. "They're going after royals."

"They're going after Moroi," I said to the guardian, irritated. "Royal. Non-royal. It doesn't matter."

There was no more information, so everyone started to disband.

Rose got up off of the couch and moved towards her mother.

"Rose, what are you doing here?" she acted as if she hadn't noticed Rose, but I had seen her looking at her daughter, with concern and pride on her face. Her daughter was taking control, coming to find the details.

"Who else was killed?" Rose demanded, looking unstoppable.

"Drozdovs," Janine looked at her daughter, a look that told her to go away. A look that told her to go worry about something else. But Rose didn't catch it.

"But who else?"

"Rose, we don't have time—"

"They had staff, right? Dimitri said non-royals. Who were they?"

"I don't know all the names. There."

Janine turned the clipboard to her. Rose scanned the list, and came away looking stunned, and upset. She put on a mask, and looked away.

"Okay, thanks."

Then her and Lissa left.

I wondered where they were going, but made no move to find out. I watched them go. I wondered what was going on in her mind, and why she needed to know who else had died. I didn't know. She was too… secretive in her thoughts, and yet she could read me like an open book.

I went to Janine.

"Can I see the list?" I inquired. She nodded and handed me the clipboard. I scanned the list, and saw what Rose had seen. Mia's mothers name was on the list.

Rose hated Mia, but I knew she felt bad. She wasn't cruel. That's what I loved about her. I didn't even bother trying to deny it in my brain.

I handed Janine the clipboard back and went to find Tasha.

* * *

There was a meeting organized, she had told me.

So I went to my room to grab a few items of mine.

When I arrived, I sat beside Rose. Christian and Lissa were sitting with the other royals, Christian and Tasha representing their family. Lissa representing her own. It surprised me to see Christian with Tasha.

I looked over at Rose, her boyfriend was beside her. I didn't like him, not at all. I was jealous, I let myself admit. But how much I wasn't sure.

"The answer's all around us. _Here. _In places like this lodge. And St. Vladimir's. We send our children to safe places, places where they have safety in numbers and can be easily guarded. And look how many of us made it here, children and adults alike. Why don't we live this way all the time?" A royal suggested, when it was his turn.

"Plenty of us already do," a voice shouted.

The man ignored the comment, continuing. "A couple of families here and there. Or a town with a large Moroi population. But those Moroi are still decentralized. Most don't pool their resources—their guardians, their magic. If we could emulate this model… we'd never have to worry about Strigoi again."

"And Moroi could never interact with the rest of the world again," Rose mumbled to herself. "Well, until humans discovered secret vampire cities sprouting up in the wilderness. Then we'd have _lots _of interactions."

I couldn't help but smile to myself. That was my Roza.

"The problem is simply that we don't have enough guardians." A Monica Szelsky spoke up. "And so, the answer is simple: _get more. _The Drozdovs had five guardians, and that wasn't enough. Only six to protect over a dozen Moroi! That's unacceptable. It's no wonder these kinds of things keep happening."

"Where do you propose getting more guardians from?" The prior royal demanded, looking enraged. "They're kind of a limited resource."

I had to agree with him. There were only so many guardians. They were killed every day. And there were so many potential female guardians that lived in communities.

"We've got plenty already. I've watched them train. They're deadly. Why are we waiting until they turn eighteen? If we accelerated the training program and focused more on combat training than bookwork, we could turn out new guardians when they're sixteen."

I made a low growl in my throat, and leaned forward, placed my elbows on my knees, and rested my head in my hands.

Sixteen? That cut two years off of training. They'd be killed so quickly in the field, they'd become less of a resource, and more of a rarity for the most important of Moroi. Whoever signed off on this would sign many novices death certificates right then and there.

"Not only that, we have plenty of potential guardians going to waste. Where are all the dhampir women? Our races are intertwined. The Moroi are doing their part to help the dhampirs survive. Why aren't these women doing theirs? Why aren't they here?"

That I had to agree with. More women should become guardians. I couldn't help but think about that.

Tasha laughed, and everyone turned to her.

"May I?" she asked the moderator.

He nodded. Tasha stood up, looking at ease in her casual dress.

"Those women aren't here, Monica, because they're too busy raising their children—you know, the ones you want to start sending out to the fronts as soon as they can walk. And please don't insult us all by acting like the Moroi do a huge favor to the dhampirs by helping them reproduce. Maybe it's different in your family, but for the rest of us, sex is fun. The Moroi doing it with dhampirs aren't really making that big of a sacrifice."

I straightened up, completely agreeing. Rose watched me, I could see her out of the corner of my eye.

She looked angry. I couldn't decipher why.

"And the reason we're waiting for these guardians to turn eighteen is so that we can allow them to enjoy some pretense of a life before forcing them to spend the rest of their days in constant danger. They need those extra years to develop mentally as well as physically. Pull them out before they're ready, treat them like they're parts on an assembly line—and you're just creating Strigoi fodder."

Gasps from the crowd, but it was completely true. There was no doubt. Tasha continued.

"You create more fodder still if you try making the other dhampir women become guardians. You can't force them into that life if they don't want it. This entire plan of yours to get more guardians relies on throwing children and the unwilling into harm's way, just so you can—barely—stay one step ahead of the enemy. I would have said it's the stupidest plan I've ever heard, if I hadn't already had to listen to his."

She looked pointedly at the first speaker, the man.

"Enlighten us then, Natasha," he said. "Tell us what _you _think we should do, seeing as you have so much experience with Strigoi."

Tasha smiled slightly, but I could tell she was annoyed. She didn't provoke the royal ass, though.

"What do I think?" She looked out into the crowd, stepping closer. "I think we should stop coming up with plans that involve us relying on someone or something to protect us. You think there are too few guardians? That's not the problem. The problem is there are too many Strigoi. And we've let them multiply and become more powerful because we do nothing about them except have stupid arguments like this. We run and hide behind the dhampirs and let the Strigoi go unchecked. It's our fault. _We _are the reason those Drozdovs died. You want an army? Well, here we are. Dhampirs aren't the only ones who can learn to fight. The question, Monica, isn't where the dhampir women are in this fight. The question is: _Where are we?"_

Tasha was shouting, and she looked passionate. I knew she was, she was ready to fight. She wanted her fellow Moroi to stand with her.

Monica Szelsky looked angry, and irritated. As thought fighting were beneath her. I shook my head as she spoke. "Surely you aren't suggesting the Moroi fight alongside the guardians when the Strigoi come?"

Tasha looked at her, completely calm, she wasn't going to lose her cool. Not here. I would hear about this later. "No. I'm suggesting the Moroi and the guardians go fight the Strigoi _before _they come."

A new Moroi stood up, Andrew something or other. Tasha had pointed him out to me before. "Oh, so, you're going to just give us clubs and stakes and send us off to do battle?"

Tasha shrugged, almost unable to hide her amusement. "If that's what it takes, Andrew, then sure. But there are other weapons we can learn to use, too. Ones the guardians can't."

Andrew rolled his eyes, and stared in disbelief. As if he couldn't put the pieces together, he asked: "Oh yeah? Like what?"

She grinned widely. "Like this."

She waved her hand, and the sweater Andrew had on the back of his chair was suddenly on fire. He threw it to the ground and stamped it out.

Everything went silent, and then panic and chaos broke out, taking over everyone's mind.

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	13. Chapter 13

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It disgusted me, how everyone stood and shouted, trying to be heard, trying to be in control. Different views all around

Tasha was wrong, Tasha was right, Tasha was crazy, Tasha was stupid, everyone thought something different. Someone even suggested she was working with the strigoi. This was ridiculous.

I stood up and looked around. I turned to Rose. "You might as well leave. Nothing useful's going to happen now.

Her and her boyfriend Rose, and started to follow me. But Mason shook his head.

"You go on," he told her. "I want to check something out.

Rose looked around, and shrugged, as if she couldn't care less. "Good luck."

We stepped out into the hall. It had been a few days since we had spoke.

"Shouldn't you be in there protecting Tasha?" Rose said, her mouth moved without her thinking about it. "Before the mob gets her? She's going to get in big trouble for using magic like that."

I raised an eyebrow, something she wished she could do, but couldn't. "She can take care of herself."

"Yeah, yeah, because she's a badass karate magic user. I get all that. I just figured since you're going to be her guardian and all…" she trailed off, and looked down for a second. Then she looked back up.

I knew her mother had probably told her. Because who else would she have heard it from? "Where did you hear that?"

"I have my sources. You've decided to, right? I mean, it sounds like a good deal, seeing as she's going to give you fringe benefits…."

Fringe benefits? Did she mean children? That wasn't why I was seriously considering taking this job. It was to forget Rose, and spare both of our careers and reputations. To save her the embarrassment and to save my job. I had to forget her.

I looked her right in the eyes, keeping calm and not letting on she had gotten to me. "What happens between her and me is none of your business," I said, honestly.

"Well, I'm sure you guys'll be happy together. She's just your type, too—I know how much you like women who aren't your own age. I mean, she's what, six years older than you? Seven? And I'm seven years younger than you."

That really hurt. The age difference was what was keeping her apart. Sometimes, I wished I was her age, so I could be with her, and other times, I wished she was older, so she could be with me. But that was just wishful thinking. I paused for a moment.

"Yes," I paused, and then I felt my control slip, and words that I didn't mean came out. "You are. And every second this conversation goes on, you only prove how young you really are."

Rose's jaw dropped. I hadn't meant that. I shouldn't have said that. I should have just kept my mouth shut. I regretted that, how harsh, how horrible it was. I put on a tough face.

"Little dhampir," Adrian Ivashkov came up behind Rose. I gritted my teeth when he grinned at Rose. He nodded to me, and Rose's face turned red. She was embarrassed. Cute.

Adrian held his hands up, but continued to talk. I really hated him. I wanted him gone. "I don't want to interrupt or anything. Just wanted to talk to you when you have time."

I looked at Adrian in a way that should have tipped off Rose about how much of a bad influence he was. That probably was what making her tolerate him. The fact that he pissed me off, and the fact that he had a bad reputation.

I was jealous, I realized. She should be with me. No, she shouldn't be with me, I told myself. It was wrong for her to be with me.

Resolve showed itself on her face.

Rose smiled, and put a hand on Adrian's arm.

"I've got time now." Rose nodded to me, and steered Adrian away, walking extremely close to him. "See you later, Guardian Belikov."

I followed them with my eyes. Rose turned, and didn't look back.

I was an idiot.

I walked back to my room and got a shower. When I got dressed, I went to stand outside, in the cold. It didn't bother me. I watched the snow fall, and just stood. I grabbed my coat and went to relieve the guardian on the nearest post.

"Guardian Belikov, you're not scheduled," she looked surprised. "My shift just started, I've got three more hours."

"I'm not going to sleep. You probably need it," I told her.

"Thanks," she nodded gratefully, and walked to wherever her room was. I stood, and paced back and forth.

She drove me crazy. All Ivashkov wanted was to have sex with her.

I had grown up with a father like that. But I didn't consider him as my father.

I sighed, standing at my post, staring at the empty wind.

It was hell trying to convince myself not to love her.

**Hope you liked it! There wasn't really much to write, but I tried my best. Review please!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Dimitri wasn't in this chapter, not at all. So yes, it's short.**

I stayed on guard duty for the next shift too.

Then I fell into a restless sleep.

When I woke, Tasha was at my door.

"You wanna go skiing, Dimka?" she asked.

"Sure, Tasha," I told her, and we walked out into the frigid air.

She rented skis and handed me a pair.

Next thing I knew, we were skiing down the hill. The view was beautiful. White mountains were in the distance, and were lit perfectly the moon.

Tasha fell, and I rushed to help her. She was okay, and I smiled.

She looked up at me, and I helped her up.

"Maybe we should be done for the day," she laughed.

I nodded softly. "Maybe."

But I was a million miles away, wondering what Rose was doing. If she was away from Ivashkov. She was probably partying with him. She'd be fine. It was Rose, not some drunken whore. She wouldn't be an idiot.

She wouldn't do anything. Wouldn't drink or smoke, or be stupid. Lissa was probably with her. The princess would prevent Rose from doing anything stupid. I knew that Rose would be okay.

I sighed. I felt like I would never get her out of my head.

Tasha and I said goodbye, and I made my way back to my room.

I sat down to read one of my westerns. Rose laughed at me for reading them. I enjoyed them, it wasn't like I ever saw her reading.

I sighed, not being able to immerse myself in my book.

I loved Rose. But I couldn't love Rose. It wasn't allowed. Tasha was better suited for me. Why couldn't I have fallen for Tasha? Why Rose?

I tortured myself with this until I fell asleep.

**Yep, it's short. Sue me. Reviews would be much appreciated!**


	15. Chapter 15

**This one was longer than usual! Whoohoo! Alright, I'm done for a while.  
I need a life. I've been updating my stories practically all day.**

**Just kidding. I love doing this.**

**It's 1:15 in the morning, and I'm still typing. So humor me and make sure to review after reading. This chapter is longer **** than most of the other ones!**

**Twitter me! KatrynaWilliams**

**Enjoy!**

I woke later than usual. I only woke because I got a phone call from Guardian Hathaway to meet her in her room. I got dressed quickly, and set out of the room. I rounded the corner, going to speak with Janine about new details on the attack. Walking down the hall, voices carried.

"Ladies, ladies," Adrian Ivashkov said. "No need to fight over me."

"We're not. I just want to know what's going on here," Rose spoke. Speeding up, I thought about what Rose could possibly be doing. I was worried about her. And what other girl was there. I finally reached them.

I spoke two words, but they startled Rose, making her jump. "Me too."

I stepped past Rose, and walked into the room, looking from Lissa, to Adrian, to Rose. Lissa was in the room. That was what surprised me the most. Rose was in the doorway.

"Male and female students aren't supposed to be in each other's rooms," I stated simply, feeling uneasy. Rose was not supposed to be hanging out with this royal jackass.

"How do you keep doing this?" Rose demanded, glaring at Adrian.

"Do what?" Adrian looked genuinely puzzled.

"Keep making us look bad!"

Adrian chuckled. "You guys are the ones who came here."

I wanted to hit him more and more every single second of the day. One of these times I would break that.

Why did she keep hanging out around Ivashkov? I felt jealous of him. Again. He wasn't much older than her… but he would use her and throw her out. This was a fact in my mind.

"You shouldn't have let them in," I told him, frowning, and wishing I could just screw up his pretty face that all the girls seemed to love. "I'm sure you know the rules at St. Vladimir's."

Adrian shrugged dismissively, as if he were above everything and everyone. He barely looked at me as he spoke. "Yeah, but I don't have to follow any school's stupid rules."

"Perhaps not," I told him, some ice slipping into my words. I had a decent amount of self control, but when it involved Rose. That control went out the door when she was around. I had to get a grip. "But I would have thought you'd still respect those rules."

Adrian rolled his eyes. "I'm kind of surprised to find _you _lecturing about underage girls."

So he had caught on. I felt anger well up inside of me, and more than anything, I wanted Adrian Ivashkov dead. Gone. Clenching my fists, I took a step closer, and regained my control.

"Besides, nothing sordid was going on. We were just hanging out," Adrian spoke with a small smile, trying to show his superiority.

"If you want to 'hang out' with young girls, do it at one of the public areas," I spoke with gritted teeth, as I stared at the royal moroi. He looked confident, as if my words didn't worry him one bit. I would have liked to beat the shit right out of him for being around Rose.

Adrian laughed a creepy laugh that made me want to leave. It sounded like the laugh of a maniac. "Young girls? _Young _girls? Sure. Young and old at the same time. They've barely seen anything in life, yet they've already seen too much. One's marked with life, and one's marked with death…but _they're _the ones you're worried about? Worry about yourself, dhampir. Worry about you, and worry about me. We're the ones who are young."

Everyone stared in silence. Ivashkov was crazy. He calmed down again, and pulled out his cigarettes, striding to the window.

Adrian was calm and looked perfectly normal again. He turned away and strolled toward the window, glancing casually back at the rest of us as he pulled out his cigarettes.

"You ladies should probably go. He's right. I am a bad influence," Adrian told them. There was something in his tone that made it so I felt uneasy.

Rose looked to her best friend, and both girls followed me out the door and down the hall to the lobby.

"That was…strange," Rose said after a moment of silence. I bit my tongue. I needed to talk to her. To tell her not to be around him.

_"Very," _I concluded.

"Rose," I began, before she left. "Can I talk to you?"  
I stepped off to the side of the room, and she followed, looking like she was in trouble. Good, I thought, because she was.

"That's Adrian Ivashkov," I told her, my tone a warning.

"Yeah, I know," she told me shortly.

"This is the second time I've seen you with him," I decided not to include the first time when I'd been spying on her.

She needed to stay the hell away from him. He would break her.

She looked at me like it was no big deal. "Yeah. We hang out sometimes."

I raised an eyebrow and motioned in the direction we'd come from. "You hang out in his room a lot?"

"What happens between him and me is none of your business," she threw my words back at me from our earlier conversation. It stung a little bit.

"Actually, as long as you're at the Academy, what you do is my business," I pointed out.

"Not my personal life. You don't have any say in that."

I looked at her, feeling extremely tired. "You're not an adult yet."

"I'm close enough. Besides, it's not like I'll magically become an adult on my eighteenth birthday."

_"Clearly," _I threw the word in her face. If she didn't grow up soon… She'd be a lot of problems..

Rose blushed. "That's not what I meant. I meant—"

"I know what you meant. And the technicalities don't matter right now. You're an Academy student. I'm your instructor. It's my job to help you and to keep you safe. Being in the bedroom of someone like _him … _well, that's not safe," I told her honestly. It wasn't. He would take advantage of her, she was naïve, young. He would take her and use her, and then spit her back out broken, useless.

"I can handle Adrian Ivashkov," she muttered. "He's weird— really weird, apparently—but harmless…" she trailed off. "Speaking of personal lives … I suppose you were off visiting Tasha, huh?"

"Actually, I was visiting your mother."

"You going to hook up with her too?" she quipped. I knew that she would go for that angle. I resisted the urge to sigh.

"No, we were looking over some new data about the Strigoi in the Drozdov attack."

She froze for a moment.

"What'd you find out?" She sounded like something was wrong with her. I wanted to hug her, to tell her it was all going to be okay. But I couldn't do that.

"We've managed to track some of the Strigoi. Or at least the humans with them. There were witnesses who lived nearby who spotted a few of the cars the group used. The plates were all from different states—the group appears to have split up, probably to make it harder for us. But one of the witnesses did catch one plate number. It's registered to an address in Spokane."

"Spokane?" she looked at me, frowning, but looking like she didn't believe me. "Spokane, _Washington? _Who makes Spokane their hideout?"

"Strigoi, apparently," I said, waiting for her to turn to leave. "The address was fake, but other evidence shows they really are there. There's a kind of shopping plaza that has some underground tunnels. There've been Strigoi sightings around that area."

"Then …" she frowned suddenly, as if she were contemplating. "Are you going to go after them? Is somebody going to? I mean, this is what Tasha's been saying all along…. If we know where they are …"

I shook my head, "The guardians can't do anything without permission from higher up. That's not going to happen anytime soon."

"Because the Moroi talk too much."

"They're being cautious," I informed her.

"Come _on. _Even you can't want to be careful on this one. You actually know where Strigoi are hiding out. Strigoi who massacred children. Don't you want to go after them when they don't expect it?" she looked like a child, eager to do anything dangerous.

"It's not that easy. We answer to the Guardian Council and the Moroi government. We can't just run off and act on impulse. And anyway, we don't know everything yet. You should never walk into any situation without knowing all the details."

"Zen life lessons again," Rose ran her hand through her hair. "Why'd you tell me this, anyway? This is guardian stuff. Not the kind of thing you let novices in on."

I sifted through the words in my head, and I looked at her, my expression softening. "I've said a few things…the other day and today…that I shouldn't have. Things that insulted your age. You're seventeen…but you're capable of handling and processing the same things those much older than you do."

"Really?" she looked as if I had just told her that she won the lottery. Thrilled.

"You're still really young in a lot of ways— and act young—but the only way to really change that is to treat you like an adult. I need to do that more. I know you'll take this information and understand how important it is and keep it to yourself."

"Dimka," Tasha called from behind Rose. She smiled to Rose, and stood by me. "Hello, Rose."

"Hey," she said flatly.

Tasha put one of her hands on my forearm, and slid her fingers along my coat.

"You've got that look," Tasha told me.

"What look?" I asked. Smiling and acting like I was having fun wasn't easy. I had to make it look convincing. Had to make Rose believe I didn't love her.

"That look that says you're going to be on duty all day," Tasha grinned.

"Really? I have a look like that?" I teased, and gauged Rose's expression.

She looked jealous, hurt, and most of all, like she believed it.

I hated hurting her, but I couldn't tell her that I loved her. We couldn't be together. It would be wrong. I had to make her believe I didn't feel anything towards her.

"When does your shift technically end?" Tasha asked me.

"An hour ago," I shrugged.

"You can't keep doing this," she groaned. "You need a break."

"Well … if you consider that I'm always Lissa's guardian…"

"For now," she knew. I didn't know if she knew why I would take the job, but I would take the job. I had to. There was no other option. "There's a big pool tournament going on upstairs."

"I can't," I smiled. "Even though I haven't played in a long time …"

"Come on, then," she begged, tugging on my arm. "Just one round! We could take them all."

"I can't," I told her again, wishing I could go and forget, and have fun. But no, I wouldn't. "Not with everything going on."

"No. I suppose not." Tasha looked at Rose, and smiled. "I hope you realize what a hard-core role model you have here. He's never off duty."

"Well," Rose copied her tone, Rose had a touch of ice in her voice. I knew why, but Tasha didn't. _"For now, _at least."

Tasha looked confused, and looked to me. She hadn't grasped that Rose had been making fun of her. I had realized this, and told her that by shooting her a look.

"We're finished here, Rose. Remember what I said," I told her, not wanting to go.

I wanted to sit with her, make sure she was okay, to apologize, and I wanted to tell Tasha that I couldn't be her guardian. But I couldn't do that. I had to forget her.

"Yeah," Rose turned away. "Definitely."

**Review please! **


	16. Chapter 16

**Sorry for the two week wait. Been a bit busy, I'm writing a novel of my own... I'm on page fifty or so... I'm lagging in all that. Lots of drama and crap. Lost a friend and stuff. Slightly angry, so haven't been in the mood to wright. I'll try to update more soon.**

**Oh and question... should I write the last few chapters or just have you read my story Rescuing Rose? Comment or message me to let me know.  
**

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**Or email me: **

**Enjoy!**

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All day I had thought of Rose, even as I got ready for Priscilla Voda's party. I was one of the guardians, so I dressed in black. Tasha was going, and I had to pick her up at her room, so when I finished getting dressed, I quickly exited the room.

When I picked up Tasha, she was already excited to go. She smiled at me when she opened the door, dressed in a sleeveless deep blue dress, that ended around her knee. Her hair was down, curled loosely, and was set over her shoulders. She looked beautiful, but wasn't enough to get Rose out of my mind.

We got there early, and I let Tasha go to do her business. I stood against the wall, admiring the job that had been done. The room was all silver and blue, with blue silk table cloths on the table. The fireplace was stained glass, and beeswax candles hung on the wall. Shortly after I arrived, a Moroi arrived and began to play cello, in the corner, as the other guests arrived.

Soon, I saw the princess arrive. Lissa was toting Rose. Why hadn't she brought her boyfriend, Christian? I looked again, to be sure. It was Rose, wearing the dress Tasha had given her.

The material clung to her skin, so tightly that you could see every curve. Every eye turned when she walked in. The shade of red complemented her perfectly.

I watched Rose take her place next to Lissa, and look around the room. She ignored the royals, and they ignored her. Lissa chatted to them. I watched Rose, because there was nothing else to do. I glanced around on occasion.

Rose looked around at the room in wonder, waiting until food was brought. Rose ate quickly, resuming looking around the room. When she finished eating, I saw her whisper something to Lissa and begin to head to the door. The princess put her hand on Rose's arm and whispered to her. Rose looked both annoyed and intimidated, but the princess laughed, shaking it off.

Rose clung to her best friend, as Lissa spoke to the royals. Everyone surrounded her, trying to talk to her. Everyone was drawn to her, and Rose stood in the background, hoping she would not have to speak. She was out of her element. I noticed this as she stood silently by her best friend, along for the ride and nothing more. The only dhampir not a guardian here.

Rose and Lissa walked toward Moroi who were starting to shout.

"What part of 'suicide' don't you understand?" One of the men in the group demanded, voice loud. He was aged, and that was clear in his features. His hair was silver, and so was his moustache. "Moroi training as soldiers will be the end of our race."

"It's not suicide. It's the right thing to do. We have to start looking out for ourselves. Learning to fight and use our magic is our greatest asset, other than the guardians," the younger man declared, standing his ground.

The older man stared indignantly. "Yes, but with the guardians, we don't need other assets. You've been listening to non-royals. They don't have any guardians of their own, so of course they're scared. But that's no reason to drag _us _down and put _our _lives at risk."

The princess interrupted. She was quiet, but every head turned toward her. "Then don't. When you talk about Moroi learning how to fight, you make it sound like an all-or-nothing matter. It's not. If you don't want to fight, then you shouldn't have to. I completely understand. But, that's because you _can _rely on your guardians. A lot of Moroi can't. And if they want to learn self-defense, there's no reason why they shouldn't do it on their own."

The younger man grinned, happy to have someone on his side. "There, you see?"

But the older man countered. "It's not that easy. If it was just a matter of you crazy people wanting to get yourselves killed, then fine. Go do it. But where are you going to learn all these so-called fighting skills?"

"We'll figure the magic out on our own. Guardians will teach us actual physical fighting," Lissa proposed, looking like a real princess. Rose stood there, watching her best friend in amazement, and wonder.

"Yes, see? I knew that was where this was going. Even if the rest of us don't take part in your suicide mission, you still want to strip us of our guardians to train up your pretend army."

The younger of the two men frowned, and his hands clenched into fists. "You owe it to us."

"No, they don't," said Lissa.

Every eye turned to her again. The older man smiled this time.

"Guardians are the best battle resources we have," the younger man said.

"They are," she agreed, "but that doesn't give you the right to take them away from their duty."

"Then how are we supposed to learn?" demanded the younger man.

"The same way guardians do," Lissa informed him. "If you want to learn to fight, go to the academies. Form classes and start at the beginning, the same way the novices do. That way, you won't be taking guardians away from active protection. It's a safe environment, and the guardians there specialize in teaching students anyway." A pause. "You could even start making defense part of the standard curriculum for Moroi students already there."

Everyone stared at the princess. This was good for both sides, not perfect, but completely reasonable. It made everything possible.

All of the members of the group began to converse, and took Lissa into the middle. Rose was on the edges of the group, but was okay with it, or so it seemed. She moved to the door, near enough for me to hear anything she would say.

"Is that goose liver?" Rose asked a waitress, pointing at the tray.

"Sweetbread." The waitress said.

Rose reached for it.

"It's pancreas," Adrian Ivashkov said from behind her. At that moment, all I wanted was for Rose to leave. I didn't want her around him.

"What?" Rose shrieked. "Are you messing with me? Sweetbread is _pancreas?"_

Ivashkov shrugged. "It's really good."

"Oh, man. Rich people suck," Rose decided as she walked with him, to my delight, closer to me, so I could hear even better.

"What are you doing here, little dhampir? Are you following me around?"

"Of course not," Rose rolled her eyes. "Especially not after all the trouble you've gotten us into."

"I don't know." Adrian winked at her. I wasn't comfortable with Rose around him. Not after how everything went this morning. "As many times as we keep seeing each other? This is, what, the fifth time? It's starting to look suspicious. Don't worry, though. I won't tell your boyfriend. Either of them."

So he knew that there was something going on. There wasn't enough proof. How could he know?

"I only have _one _boyfriend. Sort of. Maybe not anymore. And anyway, there's nothing to tell. I don't even like you."

Rose didn't have a boyfriend? What had happened to Mason?

Then I grew happier. She didn't like Ivashkov.

"No?" Adrian smiled. "Then why are you wearing my perfume?"

Rose stepped back. "I'm not."

Adrian laughed. "Of course you are. I counted the boxes after you left. Besides, I can smell it on you. It's nice. Sharp…but still sweet—just like I'm sure you are deep down inside. And you got it right, you know. Just enough to add an edge…but not enough to drown your own scent."

The way he said scent made my skin crawl. I wanted to go to Rose and make Ivashkov leave. I didn't like him being around her.

"Hey," she countered. "I had every right to take one. You offered them. Your mistake is in assuming me taking one means anything. It doesn't. Except that maybe you should be more careful with where you dump all that money of yours."

"Ooh, Rose Hathaway is here to play, folks." He grabbed a glass of champagne, and looked to Rose. "You want one?"

"I don't drink," she looked at him funny. I smiled triumphantly.

"Right." Adrian handed her a glass and she took it. The waiter walked away. "So. Sounds like our Vasilisa put my dad in his place."

"Your… That guy's your dad?" Rose looked to the group she had left.

Adrian shrugged. "That's what my mom says."

"You agree with him? About how Moroi fighting would be suicide?"

Adrian shrugged again. "I don't really have an opinion on that."

"That's not possible. How can you not feel one way or another?"

"Dunno. Just not something I think about. I've got better things to do."

"Like stalk me," Rose offered "And Lissa."

He smiled, staring at her. "I told you, you're the one following me."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Five times—" Rose froze, counting in her head. "Five times?"

He nodded.

"No, it's only been four," she insisted. "There was that first night, the night at the spa, then when I came to your room, and now tonight."

"If you say so."

"I _do _say so… You can't mean …"

Why had she frozen? What could she mean? What was wrong?

"Mean what?"

"Nothing." Rose took a sip of champagne. Damn it.

"Why are you smiling?" Adrian asked.

"Because Lissa's still over there, working that crowd."

"No surprise there. She's one of those people who can charm anyone she wants if she tries hard enough. Even people who hate her."

Rose frowned at him. "I feel that way when I talk to you."

"But you don't hate me," Adrian took the last sip of his champagne. "Not really."

"I don't like you either."

"So you keep saying." He took a step toward Rose, and I was about to walk over and say something. "But I can live with that."

"Rose!" Rose's mother called, storming over, and causing people to look and stare.

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**Hope you enjoyed. Review _please?_ Thanks! Appreciate it! I'll update soon.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Alright, sorry, sorry, sorry for the long time no update. I tried my best, but it's really late, and I'm kinda tired.**

**Let me know what you think. Review!  
Twitter me! KatrynaWilliams is my Twitter. Or email me. blueflowersrose(at)aol(dot)com.**

**On with the story.**

I cringed mentally at the sight of Janine. I had an idea of what was coming. She would give Rose hell, and make everyone listen.

"What do you think you're doing?" Janine demanded of Rose. Her voice was raised, and everyone appeared to be listening in on their conversation. Including me.

"Nothing," Rose tried, "I—"

Janine looked furious, anger glinting in her eyes. "Excuse us, Lord Ivashkov." Janine grabbed Rose's arm and pulled her into the hall. Champagne spilled onto Rose and onto the floor.

The party went back to normal, but I heard muted shouting from Rose.

It all stopped, after ten minutes or so. I excused myself, and said goodbye to Tasha as she walked past me. She wanted to follow, but I had refused.

Rose was walking down the hall. I followed her, and she opened the door to the stairs. I waited a few moments, and followed her up.

She wasn't okay. She was upset, and she wasn't known for doing smart things when she was upset.

Not to mention, the stairs went to a deck, and it was freezing outside. All she was wearing was a dress. She would freeze, and I didn't want that.

When I walked up, she had her arms wrapped around herself, and was staring at the sky, and the sun. The sun didn't provide much warmth, but it shone down upon the roof, making the snow glitter.

Rose saw me, and she turned away. I walked to her, and took of my coat. I put it around her shoulders. She must have been freezing, but she would never dare to admit it.

I sat down beside her, and looked to her. "You must be freezing."

"The sun's out," she replied shortly. She was so stubborn. She would not admit weakness. And that was one of the reasons I loved her so damned much.

I tipped back my head, and looked to the cloudless sky and the sun. Seeing the sun wasn't common when you lived amongst moroi. Days and nights were all mixed up and backwards, so the sun was something you only saw when you were on duty. I rarely got duty at 'night.' "It is. But we're still on a mountain in the middle of winter."

Rose didn't respond. We sat in silence, but it wasn't awkward or uncomfortable. The wind was blowing snow around.

"My life is a disaster," Rose said abruptly. She was so upset, and I couldn't do much.

"It's not a disaster," I told her. It wasn't. Not compared to what it could be.

Her dark eyes looked to me, and she brushed her hair out of her face. "Did you follow me from the party?"

"Yes." I told her honestly.

She looked me over. "I didn't even know you were there. So you saw the illustrious Janine cause a commotion by dragging me out," she sighed, and looked away for a moment.

"It wasn't a commotion. Hardly anyone noticed. I saw because I was watching you," I lied. Everyone had noticed. I had been watching, but it hadn't been only me.

"That's not what she said," she spoke quietly. She avoided my gaze, and looked to the sun. "I might as well have been working a corner as far as she was concerned."

"She's just worried about you," I tried. No matter what Rose thought, Janine was her mother, and worried about her. There was no other way about it.

"She overreacted," Rose said. She would not believe me, she was too stubborn. She wanted to be proven right.

"Sometimes mothers are overprotective," I offered to her.

She looked at me again, staring into my eyes this time. I loved her eyes, they were so warm, and kind. "Yeah, but this is _my _mother. And she didn't seem that protective, really. I think she was more worried I'd embarrass her or something. And all that becoming-a-mother-too-young stuff was stupid. I'm not going to do anything like that." She sighed, and slumped her shoulders.

"Maybe she wasn't talking about you," I put the connection together. Janine could have easily been talking about herself.

Rose's jaw dropped, and I watched her think back to the conversation with her mother. Janine had been young when she'd had Rose.

Rose sighed, and stopped thinking so hard.

"We aren't fighting right now." She stated. I resisted the urge to laugh, or smile.

I glanced at her, and then turned back to the sun after a moment. "Do you want to fight?"

"No. I hate fighting with you. Verbally, I mean," she corrected herself. "I don't mind in the gym."

I allowed myself to smile a tiny bit. "I don't like fighting with you either."

We lapsed into a silence. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it wasn't inviting either.

Suddenly, Rose spoke again."You should take it."

I felt myself flinch. "What?"

"Tasha's offer. You should take her up on it. It's a really great chance." She sighed. I knew how hard this must be on her. She didn't want me to go, to leave. So her saying this meant a lot. She was trying to be sensitive, and not selfish. Because she knew that if it was what I thought was right I would do it.

"I never expected to hear you say anything like that," my voice was tight, and I tried to keep the emotion from shining through. "Especially after—"

"What a bitch I've been? Yeah." She pulled my coat around her tighter as the wind picked up. "Well. Like I said, I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want us to hate each other. And…well …" Rose shut her eyes tightly, and then opened them again, looking over at me. "No matter how I feel about _us … _I want you to be happy."

Silence fell again.

The sudden urge to hold her became overwhelming. I put an arm around her, unable to contain myself. I pulled her closer to me, and she put her head on my chest. "Roza," was all I said, but I knew it was enough. Emotions rushed through me, and I couldn't contain them for much longer.

She sighed, and I wondered why. I had a strange feeling something was on her mind. Something important.

She pulled out of my arms, removed my coat from her shoulders, handed it to me, and stood. I couldn't figure out what she was doing, but I sensed her uneasiness.

"Where you going?" I asked her, concerned. Something was up with her.

"To break someone's heart," she replied, looking at me one last time. Then she walked away.

I sighed, and Tasha emerged, onto the roof.

She sat beside me, and I was stunned.

"I know, Dimka," she sighed.

"Know?"

She sighed, and flinched as the sun hit her directly. "About you and Rose. That you love her, and that she loves you."

"How did you know, Tasha?"

"The way you look at her. The way she looks at you. How Rose talks to me. She thinks I'm going to take you away."  
"That's why I have to say no."

"That's what you have to do, Dimka. You can't be with me, if your heart is somewhere else," she leaned into my shoulder.

I looked at her.

"Thank you. For understanding," I sighed, and so much rushed into my mind.

She was my best friend, for so long. And she actually understood. I should have known that she, of all people, would understand.

We sat in silence until she couldn't take the sun anymore. Then I walked her to her room.

"I'll see you later, Dimka," she said. "Good night."  
I nodded shortly. "Good night, Tasha."

**Here's a question…**

**In the actual books, who do you think should end up with who?**

**My pairings:**

**Rose and Dimitri **

**Lissa and Christian **

**Mia and Eddie**

**Janine and Abe **

**Adrian and Tasha**

**Sydney and…? (Not sure. Mason if he was still alive, but sadly, he's not. So, ideas?)**

**Anyway, let me know your character pairings, and review! I'll update soon! Promise!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Here's the next update! Suggestions? Let me know. Twitter- KatrynaWilliams. Email? Blueflowersrose(at)aol(dot)com.**

**Oh, and thank you so much for every single review. They mean a lot to me. They make me feel good about myself and my writing. I read every one, and I love the feeling they give me. Like I'm floating. So don't think I don't care about them, cuz I do.**

**And which book should I do in the series next? Shadow Kiss? Or book one? Toss up. Let me know your thoughts, they matter.**

**Let me know what you think! That means review! Thanks for reading!**

After I walked Tasha to her room and said goodbye, I started to my room.

Then I changed directions. I needed to talk to Rose.

"Belikov!" my name was shouted loudly, and sharply, down through the hall. It echoed softly throughout the building, before I turned to look at the guardian who had been shouting for me.

Rose would have to wait.

"What is it, Guardian Thomas?" I asked him, wanting nothing more than for him to just leave. He could handle whatever it was with the other guardians here.

"A guardian, he was knocked out at his post. We have to do an attendance check, to make sure no one left. They wanted you to be there. Report to the cafeteria."

I nodded, and started toward the cafeteria. It sounded something just stupid enough for Rose to do. There was a feeling in the pit of my stomach, the feeling that it was Rose.

She would have taken the Princess with her. I scanned the room, which was filling with students faster than I'd ever thought it could.

The Princess was there, but I didn't see Rose, or Lissa's boyfriend, Christian. I didn't see Rose's boyfriend either.

_Calm down_, I told myself, _she's here, she'll be down soon_. They closed the door, and there was still no Rose, but all the rooms were empty. There was nowhere for her to go.

Lissa was still alone, looking worried, and glancing around furiously, probably looking for Rose and Christian. She finally gave up, as had I.

I couldn't even think straight, when Tasha grabbed my forearm.

They called out names, and circulated the room.

"Everyone stay calm. We would like all students to return to their rooms, and all guardians to remain here," Headmistress Kirova announced. Students filed out, one by one, painfully slowly. I ached to find out who it had been.

I sighed.

"There are five missing students," Kirova said. "They are, Mia Rinaldi." She started.

Rose would never run off with Mia Rinaldi. She despised Mia, and they were in some kind of war.

"Eddie Castile. Mason Ashford. Christian Ozera."

I froze. Eddie, Mason, Christian? No, no, no!

"And Rose Hathaway."

It had been her. My heart sank, and Tasha's grip on my forearm grew tighter. "She'll be okay," Tasha whispered in my ear. "If anyone, she'll be okay. She can handle herself."

"Belikov!" Alberta shouted my name. Check the bus station. Take Hathaway with you."

Janine and I left. There was a man at the bus station selling tickets.

"Excuse me," Janine strolled up to him. "But have you seen five teens. Eighteen years old, one with long brown hair and brown eyes, one with black hair and blue eyes…" she listed the descriptions. The man's expression was blank.

"No, there was no one matching that description. Sorry, guys," he said. He must have been on something, because he reeked of drugs.

We got back, and everyone was in full search mode.

Janine approached me again. "Headmistress Kirova thinks it would be best if you and I go to speak to the princess."

I nodded, and we started to the room that Rose and Lissa shared. My stomach felt like it was going to give out.

I knocked, and Lissa opened the door, tears on her face. She knew. She let us in.

"Princess, we need to know where they are. Do you know anything?" I asked gently.

"No. I don't know. She didn't tell me. No one told me anything," she cried.

"I know you want to protect them, but we need to know where they are," I tried.

Lissa sat on the bed, and looked at us.

"I told you. _I _don't know. I don't know what happened."

Janine was getting tense. Upset. Her daughter was missing.

"I can't believe they wouldn't have told you where they were going," Janine finally spoke. There was worry on her face, for her daughter. Everyone portrayed her as heartless, but she was just good at hiding her emotions. "Especially with your…bond."

"It only works one way," said Lissa. "You know that."

I knelt down, to look her in the eyes. "Are you sure there's nothing? Nothing at all you can tell us? They're nowhere in town. The man at the bus station didn't see them … though we're pretty sure that's where they must have gone. We need something, _anything _to go on."

Lissa gritted her teeth, and she glared at us, something she didn't do often. She was growing frustrated, and she was worried. "Don't you think if I knew, I'd tell you? You don't think I'm worried about them too? I have _no _idea where they are. None. And why'd they even leave… it doesn't make any sense either. Especially why they'd go with Mia, of all people."

She was hurt, and that was obvious. Mia didn't get along with them, and Rose took Mia instead of her.

I sighed and leaned back on my heels. I knew she was telling us the truth. But there had to be something, someone who knew something.

"Thank you, Princess," Janine concluded.

She looked all business, but she wasn't.

We stepped outside and a single tear streaked down her face.

She turned to walk away.

"Hathaway," I called. I knew she was scared for her daughter. For everyone. She was terrified, and she knew that Rose wouldn't have left without a reason. "We'll find her. Them."

"Thank you, Belikov," she nodded, smiled a small smile, and walked down the hall.

I walked to my room, feeling more helpless than ever.

I couldn't find her, I didn't know where she was, I couldn't help her. What if there were strigoi… no, don't think like that.

I fell into bed, mind never shutting off.

**Okay, so everyone, I am out of new music. I'd appreciate suggestions of bands, and songs. I listen to just about anything and everything, and listen to music as I write. Music helps me to write faster. Any type of music will help. If I like it, I'll let you know. I listen to any genre, and I'm not picky, I just can't think of anything. Just any of your favorite bands or songs, they'll help. Review or PM them to me.**

**Thank you for reading, and please review. They mean so much to me!**


	19. Chapter 19

**Hey guys, here's nineteen. We're nearing the end now… WHOOHOO! So, should I do book one, or three next?**

**Let me know.**

**And again, music suggestions?**

**Yeah it's a little short…**

**On with the chapter!**

I couldn't sleep, so I went to where headquarters was for the moment.

Alberta, Janine, and others were there, in full project mode. A big table was in the middle, and Alberta was sitting at the head. I took a seat near her, but not right beside her. I listened into the conversation, and tried not to say anything.

"Vasilisa knows nothing," Alberta was telling a guardian. They were all crowding around her, and listening.

"Nothing? I don't believe that. She knows something. She's just protecting Rose Hathaway and Christian Ozera," a guardian spat at everyone.

I couldn't not say anything, not anymore. They were discussing how truthful the Princess really was, and Janine was not saying anything in Lissa's defense. "She wasn't lying. She was crying, and she was upset. There is no way she would lie to guardians," I defended Lissa. She would never lie. Not if something bad would happen to Rose, or to her boyfriend.

"She was protecting her best friend and her boyfriend," the guardian shot back. "She would lie for them."  
"Enough!" Alberta shouted at the both of us. At all of us, because we were all talking, all arguing amongst ourselves. We weren't getting anywhere with all of the arguing. No, we would get nowhere like this. "We need to think of where they might be. Guardian Alistair, leave, now, and do not come back unless you are willing to help."

The guardian stomped off, and slammed the door.

The door opened up, slamming off the wall. "Belikov!" Adrian stood in the doorway. "Can I speak to you? Alone?"  
I walked out with him, and we stood in the hall.

"What, Ivashkov?"

"Rose, she's in big trouble. I got cut off, but she said she's in a basement, of a house. She needs help. She's with Mason, Eddie, Mia, and Christian. She's trapped, and she needs help now. We save her soon, or they all die," he let information tumble out in a rush.

I didn't question how he knew. I nodded, and it all clicked together. "Thank you, Adrian," I rushed back to the guardians, and commanded their attention.

"I know where the students are!" I shouted. "In Spokane. They're in danger. Captured by strigoi. We have to find them, soon, or they'll _die._"

They'd gotten caught by strigoi.

I hoped she'd still be alive when we got there, but there was a good chance that it would be too late. We needed to find them, and fast.

"How do you know?" Alberta asked.

"I just know. We have to find them."  
Too slowly, she accepted the fact, and called people. Guardians. Ones who would go, and ones who would stay.

Janine, Alberta, and a few others were all going. So was I. The others were staying, to protect the academy's other students.

Rose was my priority, and I knew that it was wrong. The moroi should have been my priority, but instead, it was Rose. And I felt like I was wrong, and horrible.

I had fallen, and I had fallen too far.

There was no way out, not anymore. I sighed, and we got on the academy's jet. No packing. We all had stakes. Weapons.

We just had to find exactly where they were. And it'd be okay. It'd be fine. Maybe.

I hoped like hell that Rose would be alive, and okay when we got there.


	20. Chapter 20

**Okay, so I know this is lazy of me, but this is going to be chapters 20-22. I'll do chapter 23. But there's nothing much to do with 20 or 21. Dimitri's in part of 22…**

**Anyway, I came up with an idea. I'm going to do book one AND three next… kind of alternate? I'll do my best.**

**And I started a new story. It's called Life Comes Around… check it out.**

**Here's the chapter!**

I was worried, the entire flight. It was a short flight, but nerve wracking for all of us.

I wasn't sure where we'd find them. We got out of the plane, and split up through the city, cell phones all connected.

Of course, I was the one who ran into Mia, Christian, and a very detached, hurt looking Eddie.

I ran to them, and so did Janine. We had been paired together.

"Where's Rose?" I asked. "And Mason?" I added, knowing it was weird to be concerned about only Rose.

"They're… they're back there," Mia sobbed. "Mason's dead. They killed him!"

My stomach sank, and urgency came to my mind.  
"What happened to Rose?" Janine demanded, patience wavering. She was worried, and so was I.

"She at (Make up some random address cuz I didn't feel like it.) It's down that way," Mia sobbed.

I called some guardians, and a few took the students back to the plane.

The rest of us flooded into the building.

Rose wasn't anywhere to be seen… until.

I saw her first. She was just sitting there, sword in hand, two strigoi dead beside her. Mason was dead, in her lap.

Guardians flooded around her, and she lifted her head.

She didn't look like she'd ever recover from this. She was… broken. Wrong.

Some guardians approached her, her mother one of them. Rose leapt up from where she sat, and held the sword, guarding Mason's body.

"Stay back." She warned. "Stay away from him."

They kept walking toward her, and she looked about ready to snap. I stopped one of them, and started toward Rose myself.

"Stay back!" she screamed, her voice breaking. She was so helpless, defenseless. I kept going towards her. I had to make sure she was okay.

"Rose. Drop the sword." I said, voice gentle.

Her hands were shaking and she refused to look at any of our faces. "Get away from us."

"Rose." I spoke firmly.

She looked around, finally realizing that it was over. That she was okay. Then she looked at me. My heart soared, seeing that she was okay. Not hurt.

"It's okay," I told her. "Everything's going to be okay. You can let go of the sword."

Her hands were shaking hard, and she kept her hands planted on the sword. "I can't. I can't leave him alone. I have to protect him." She told me.

"You have," I said. She had protected him. She couldn't have done anything.

She dropped the sword, and it landed loudly. She fell next, onto all fours

I wrapped my arms around her, and I helped her up. The voices started again, and Rose looked at the faces. I tried to get her to leave, but she didn't move. She clutched at me, and I soothed her hair away from her face, murmuring to her in Russian. She was becoming more relaxed, but she wasn't okay. Not yet. She leaned against me.

Everyone knelt near the strigoi.

"She did that? Both of them?" Guardian Thomas exclaimed.

"That sword hasn't been sharpened in years!" another guardian shouted.

Rose made a strangled noise, and I squeezed her shoulder.

"Get her out of here, Belikov," Janine told me. I nodded, and squeezed Rose's shoulder again.

"Come on, Roza. It's time to go." I said, voice soft.

She stood and let me guide her out, and I held on to her. I got her onto the jet, and everyone boarded slowly.

The plane lifted off, and I told her that I'd be back shortly. I stood, and left her.

I spoke to a guardian about what there had been at the scene. He described it to me in some detail, and I walked back to where Rose was. But Mia was beside her, and had draped a blanket around Rose's shoulders.

Rose shook her head, and Mia stood and left her in her seat. Mia walked to Janine, and said something. Janine walked to her daughter and sat beside her.

She asked Rose a question, but received no answer. Janine wrapped her arms around her daughter, and Rose sobbed into her mother's chest. Janine spoke words to Rose, and I knew they were words of comfort. I walked back down the aisle of the jet, and found a seat to sit in and think.

**Okay. That's that. One more chapter. I should have that up in like a half hour! I'm on a roll… Music suggestions? **


	21. Chapter 21

**Alright. The last chapter of Frostbite! I'm DONE WITH THIS BOOK!**

**It was a ton of fun though.**

**Alright, so I'll start books one and three soon. And check out my new story Life Comes Around.**

**Yep. That's it! Review please!**

The next few day were warm for the winter. Snow melted. The sun came out.

Winter wasn't over, though.

I didn't see much of Rose in the next few days. She didn't have many injuries. A few burns, cuts, and bruises.

On her fourth day, her molnija ceremony was scheduled. She would receive two marks.

The ceremony was in the guardian building, in the room for meetings. It was a very simple room.

All guardians attended the ceremony. No novices or moroi attended.

There was a stool in the corner of the room for Rose. She leaned forward and her hair hung over her face. The tattoo needle started to move on her neck.

Rose flinched a lot during the drawing of the tattoos. But she made it through.

Everyone went up to her, gave her a hug, and said some kind of kind words.

When I walked up to her, I said nothing. I knew that she wouldn't want me to say anything. I touched her cheek, nodded to her, and walked down the hall.

Rose ate when the food was served. She answered questions, but she wasn't really _her,_ I noticed with fascination. She was just going through the motions.

Rose went back to her classes, and guardians went back to… guarding. Everyone bugged her about her tattoos, and she played along, without actually letting anyone see.

The day passed uneventfully. I figured that Rose would show for practice, so I waited for her in the gym. She didn't need to practice yet. She needed to recover. To be _her _again.

She emerged from the locker room, and walked into the supply room, where I sat, reading a Western.

"I thought you might come by," I put a bookmark in the book, and stood.

"It's time for practice," she stated. She was just going through the motions, and I could tell.

I shook my head, looking her over. "No. No practice today. You still need to recover."

"I've got a clean bill of health. I'm good to go." She tried. But the words, they didn't work, not on me. I could see right through her.

I pointed to the chair beside me, and sat back down. "Sit down, Rose."  
She hesitated but obeyed. I scooted toward her and we were directly across from each other. I looked into her eyes.

"No one gets over their first kill…kills…easily. Even with Strigoi…well, it's still technically taking a life. That's hard to come to terms with. And after everything else you went through …" I sighed, then reached out and caught her hand in mine. I hesitated, but then started to speak again. "When I saw your face…when we found you in that house…you can't imagine how I felt."

"How … how did you feel?"

I decided to be honest. "Devastated … grief-stricken. You were alive, but the way you looked … I didn't think you'd ever recover. And it tore me apart to think of that happening to you so young." He squeezed my hand. "You will recover—I know that now, and I'm glad. But you aren't there. Not yet. Losing someone you care about is never easy." I looked directly at her, and she dropped her eyes.

"It's my fault," she said in a small voice. She sounded so helpless, and I wasn't sure I'd heard her correctly.

"Hmm?" I asked. She couldn't have meant what I thought she meant.

"Mason. Getting killed."

"Oh, Roza. No. You made some bad decisions…you should have told others when you knew he was gone…but you can't blame yourself. You didn't kill him." I sighed. It hadn't been her fault.

She was on the verge of crying. "I might as well have. The whole reason he went there—it was my fault. We had a fight…and I told him about the Spokane thing, even though you asked me not to…."

She let a tear loose, and I wiped it from her cheek.

"You can't blame yourself for that," I told her. "You can regret your decisions and wish you'd done things differently, but in the end, Mason made his decisions too. That was what he chose to do. It was his decision in the end, no matter your original role." It was not her fault. She needed to understand that. It wasn't her who had been at fault.

I loved her, but she was too hard on herself.

She spoke with difficulty. "I just wish I'd been able to … I don't know, do anything…"

She pulled away her hands, and stood.

"I should go. Let me know when you want to start practice again. And thanks for … talking." She started to leave.

I decided she needed to know about the deal with Tasha. "No."

She looked at me, confused. "What?"

I looked directly at her, my eyes meeting hers.

"No. I told her no. Tasha."

"I …" She closed her mouth, and then opened it again to speak. Rose Hathaway, speechless. That wasn't something you saw every day. "But…why? That was a once-in-a-lifetime thing. You could have had a baby. And she … she was, you know, into you…."

I smiled a small, small smile. "Yes, she was. Is. And that's why I had to say no. I couldn't return that…couldn't give her what she wanted. Not when…" I stepped towards her. "Not when my heart is somewhere else."

"But you seemed so into her. And _you _kept going on about how young I acted."

"You act young," I said, "because you _are _young. But you know things, Roza. Things people older than you don't even know. That day … You were right, about how I fight to stay in control. No one else has ever figured that out— and it scared me. _You _scare me."

"Why? Don't you want anyone to know?"

I shrugged. Rose… she scared me. She knew more than I'd ever wanted anyone to know, even myself. "Whether they know that fact or not doesn't matter. What matters is that someone—that you—know me that well. When a person can see into your soul, it's hard. It forces you to be open. Vulnerable. It's much easier being with someone who's just more of a casual friend."

"Like Tasha."

"Tasha Ozera is an amazing woman. She's beautiful and she's brave. But she doesn't—"

"She doesn't _get _you," Rose finished my sentence for me.

I nodded. She knew me so well. "I knew that. But I still wanted the relationship. I knew it would be easy and that she could take me away from you. I thought she could make me forget you."

"But she couldn't."

I sighed, and decided that I should be truthful with Rose. Because she could see right through the lies. "Yes. And, so … that's a problem."

"Because it's wrong for us to be together."

"Yes." I said.

"Because of the age difference." She stated.

"Yes."

"But more importantly because we're going to be Lissa's guardians and need to focus on her—not each other."

"Yes."

She looked right at me and didn't say anything for a moment. "Well, the way I see it, we aren't Lissa's guardians _yet."_

I realized then how much I loved her, and how much she was right. I kissed her. I cupped her face between my hands, thinking about how much I wished we could be together. The kiss strengthened, and finally I pulled away, kissed her forehead, and broke away. I ran a few fingers through her hair, and down her cheek. Then I stepped away.

"I'll see you later, Roza," I said, allowing myself a moment of happiness.

"At our next practice?" Rose asked. "We _are _starting those up again, right? I mean, you still have things to teach me."

I looked at her from the doorway, took in her face one more time, and smiled. "Yes. Lots of things."

**That was so much fun! I can't believe I'm done with Frostbite! Review please!**


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